Today, I am the laziest person alive. Enjoy my lame attempt to fill a post by answering some of your comments from yesterday's post here, instead of in the comment section where this kind of crap belongs. I'm sorry. Ok, I'm not. But that shouldn't stop you from loving me.
Knight said: Okay, I have it all figured out. What you need to do is convince your followers that Twisted Tink is actually the story of creation and make it the new bible like the scientologists did with the sci-fi book. If they believe you hold the keys to their happiness and afterlife they will start giving you money so you will help them. Just imagine, you could have a huge group of people that follow you around dressed as fairies and believing you have magical powers.
You. Are. Brilliant! Maybe I could recruit the real, live Peter Pan to be my pope. We'd have a holiday every Monday. Casual Fridays would mean coming to work in your PJ's, drunk. Wings would be mandatory, obviously. But the dudes could wear black ones, with spikes on them. I'm not picky. All I would require is your absolute submission... Just like the government. I would totally rock as Ruler.
Mamatulip said: Tell me about the follow feature. Is it like Twitter? I'm not on Blogger so I have no idea what you're talking about.
I'm not exactly sure how it works either. All I know is that when you log on to your Blogger account, there's a little icon that says "Followers". When you click on it, it shows you who has pledged to be your loyal henchman (or woman) for all of time. Pretty neat, huh? So far I have eleven henchpeople.
Apathy Lounge said: Books, The Office, reruns of The Gilmore Girls. Toast with butter. Chocolate milk. Mexican beer.
I heart Jim. Is it deranged that I think I would LIKE working in that office?
Michael Knight Rambo said: I always wanted to be a cult leader. I like the idea of sitting around drinking and sleeping with my hot followers while they make me money and do my laundry and stuff. Plus you can make them do silly shit like chanting and whatnot. I tried to start one at work a few years ago but I'm just too lazy and have no follow through. Sigh. Good Luck!
See, that's where you screwed up. There are supposed to be incentives to joining a cult. Like free drugs... or WINGS. P.S. I've been dying to ask you, what's the story behind your name?
Chris said: Y'know, I think you can create your own Wikipedia page - you and Hoop should go for it!
I could; but who would read it? I'm waiting until we get famous (or infamous) first.
One Daisy said: I am currently worshiping batteries. They seem to be a girls best friend. I could be the Duracell Queen and wear a head garment made of copper. Of course I would be wearing fabulous shoes too.
No, a vibrator is a girl's best friend. But hey, maybe that's where all your batteries are going. ;)
Alli said: I would totally join your cult. totally. as long as you don't make me wear squirrel feet in my hair. By the way, I decided you look like a young Diane Lane. Have you been told that a million times?
I haven't! But I'm really flattered. Thank you. Let's do a comparison.
Hot picture, huh?
Speaking of hot pictures, check out this ad I saw on Facebook:
Oh crap, I'm out of time! I had other things to say too. Like, what the hell is hot bologna in a jar?! This is really going to aggravate Jay . He hates when I only reply back to some of the comments and not all of them. Oh well. I guess I'll have to make him co-cult leader.
Have a great/safe weekend Homebloys!