Happy Hoopla 2!

(The 2nd anniversary of the day Hoop discovered this blog)

May I present to you...

THE HOOP INTERVIEW!

Also known as a really long and pointless Hoop conversation. Although I'm 99.9% sure there are no small children that read this blog, I would like to point out that this post has some mature content in it. So, flee little ones! Quick, before I corrupt your innocence! Are they gone? Good. Enjoy!

Hoop: How many questions are there?
Tink: I don't know. I'm writing them as I go.
Hoop: This should be interesting...

1. Would you say that you're a boob man, a butt man, or a leg man?
Hoop: Didn't you ask me that one last year?
Tink: I don't think so.
Hoop: Ass man.

2. What's your least favorite movie?
Hoop: What's the last shitty movie that we saw?
Tink: Um, The Happening.
Hoop: Yeah, put me down for that one.

3. If you could magically get any three items in the world, what would they be?
Hoop: Every card that I've ever wanted to collect.
Tink: You do realize what a nerd that makes you sound like, right?
Hoop: Every video game I've ever wanted.
Tink: You mean to tell me that if you could have ANY three things in the world, you would choose cards and video games for the first two?
Hoop: I already have everything that I want. What else is there?
Tink: Oh I don't know, what about a sweet car?
Hoop: Sure.
Tink: *Sigh*

4. Where do you see yourself in a year?
Hoop: King of the world.
Tink: Pfft. You would. No, seriously.
Hoop: In a ditch-
Tink: Hoooooop.
Hoop: -sleeping... in a box.

5. Which are scarier, vampires or wolverines?
Hoop: What? Why would I be scared of a wolverine?
Tink: Oops. I meant werewolf.
Hoop: A werewolf.
Tink: *Scoff*

6. Which is better, Pepsi or Coke?
Hoop: Pepsi.
Tink: Dr. Pepper or Mr. Pibb?
Hoop: Pibb.
Tink: Costumes or lingerie?
Hoop: Lingerie.

7. Would you rather live in a mansion in Iowa or a shack in Hawaii?
Hoop: The mansion.
Tink: But, it's in IOWA.
Hoop: So? I'd just fly to Hawaii whenever I wanted.

8. Would you rather lose a pinkie or have Ebay shut down FOR-EV-ER?
Hoop: Lose a pinkie.
Tink: That was a quick answer.
Hoop: I'm just kidding. There'd be another Ebay eventually. It would be stupid to lose a pinkie over nothing.
Tink: True.

9. If you were a cartoon, which character would you be?
Hoop: Elmer Fudd.
Tink: Great.
Hoop: Why don't you ask me what superpower I'd like to have?
Tink: I think I asked you that last year.
Hoop: So?

10. If you could have one superpower, what would it be?
Hoop: Ah-would-be-um, what do you call it? Invincible! And I could fly.
Tink: That's TWO superpowers.
Hoop: Superman has both.
Tink: That's because Superman has more than one super power.
Hoop: Don't tell me what I can't have.

11. What's the best T.V. show of all time?
Hoop: The Office.
Tink: Really? More than Chuck?
Hoop: Does Chuck come on next Monday?
Tink: *Sigh* No... again. Chuck doesn't come on until this fall.
Hoop: Oh. Then, no.

12. In your opinion, what is the most annoying habit someone can have?
Hoop: Breathing loudly through their nose when they talk.

13. Would you ever have plastic surgery done on your body (for purely pleasurable purposes)?
Hoop: Nah. Unless you wanted me to get a penis enlargement.
Tink: You want me to put that down as your answer?
Hoop: Hey, it's your interview!
Tink: Actually, it's yours. But oh-kay.

14. If you could live anywhere in the world for a year, where would it be?
Hoop: Canada... or Hawaii... or Australia.
Tink: Wow, babe. Those are three totally different places.

15. This is called "2 Truths and a Lie". You have to share three things about yourself, two true and one false. Then the blogosphere has to guess which is which.
Hoop: Do they have to be interesting facts?
Tink: I guess not.
Hoop: I have three balls. No, that's too obvious. I have no gallbladder. I have no life insurance. I love Mustangs.

16. Would you ever go on a reality show?
Hoop: YES.
Tink: What if you would have no idea what the show was about until you were on it?
Hoop: YES.

17. Is there anything that you've never told me before that you would like to tell me now?
Hoop: I have three balls.
Tink: I think I would know if that were true.
Hoop: I used to be a woman.
Tink: Moving on.

18. Is there something about me that you've always wanted to know but have never asked?
Hoop: Have you ever done another girl?
Tink: How would I DO another girl?
Hoop: What do you mean?
Tink: I mean, I don't have the necessary equipment to DO a girl.
Hoop: *Sigh* Have you ever touched the flesh of another girl in an sexual manner?
Tink: No.
Hoop: *Grumbles* Fine.

19. What's your favorite cuss word?
Hoop: Fuck. No, douche-bag. Wait, is douche-bag a cuss word?
Tink: Can you say it in church?

20. Would you ever kiss a dude for $10,000?
Hoop: ...
Tink: Hello?
Hoop: Yeah.
Tink: What? You would kiss a dude?
Hoop: For $10,000? Definitely.
Tink: Wow. I- Wow.

21. What was your favorite toy as a kid?
Hoop: A vibrator.
Tink: Wha- NO.
Hoop: Transformers.
Tink: Thank you.
Hoop: Is that it?
Tink: Isn't that enough? !

Look for the top 5 Hoop conversations in the post below...