Tuesday, November 07, 2006

On The Run

The HVAC and plumbing people are coming over at one. Cross your fingers they don't empty my wallet. I'm all out of spare arms and legs today.

Daily Hoop Conversation:
Hoop: The school faxed me over my transcript letter.
Tink: That's great!
Hoop: Not really.
Tink: Oh no. What happened?
Hoop: Here, let me read it to you. "To Whom It May Concern. This letter is to verify that Hoop has completed the courses necessary to obtain his Bachelors degree in Nursing."
Tink: *Starts choking* NURSING?!
Hoop: MmHmm.
Tink: Nursing.
Hoop: I swear, there isn't anything this school can't screw up.
Tink: So... do you want to practice those nursing skills on me tonight?
Hoop: I'm glad YOU find this so funny.
Tink: We could get you one of those cute little white hats!

Daily Hoop Conversation 2:
(While laying in bed half asleep)
Hoop: Babe?
Tink: Hm?
Hoop: What did they mean by "Nursing?" Like, nursing BABIES?
Tink: No, you goob. Like a Nurse in a hospital.
Hoop: Oh.
Tink: How exactly would you nurse a baby?
Hoop: They make devices. I've also heard that men can lactate if they-
Tink: -Good-night Hoop.

Daily Hoop Conversation 3:
Tink: *Wraps bra around head*
Hoop: That's lovely dear. New hat?
Tink: No, mouse ears.
Hoop: It looks like you have boobs on top of your head.
Tink: Men would love that.
Hoop: If you're going to grow a second pair, you should do it on your back.
Tink: How would that be practical?
Hoop: I could cop a feel no matter which side I hug you from!

November Search Terms:
(What people put into search engines that bring them here)
1. Bologna car finish
AKA: Bologna Facing, the act of putting Bologna on someone's car to peel the paint off. I'm not sure if this is myth or fact, but feel free to try it and post back some pictures.
2. corn in dookie It's one of the great mysteries of the world. Even when you don't eat any, it's STILL in there.
3. urban dictionary "smoke out" You been smokin' da reefer?
4. description of pickled beef tongue Rubbery? I don't know. Quit putting me off my lunch.

Countdown Until Hoop And I Are Homeless: 14 Days


At 07 November, 2006, Blogger Gracey said...

I love the "Boob" conversation. It is totally something Jeremy would have said to me. Maybe I'll do a test and put a bra on my head and see what he says. I can almost guarantee he would say what Hoop said. lol! Men and breasts...I just don't understand their infactuation about them.

At 07 November, 2006, Blogger Mary said...

Like nursing babies? OMG. Seriously?

thanks for the giggle hoop. I'll have to repeat that at the hospital this afternoon...

At 07 November, 2006, Blogger EE said...

LMAO at the nursing thing. And THEN that Hoop thought you were talking about actually NURSING something. PIMP!

At 07 November, 2006, Anonymous OddMix said...

I really want to see a picture of Hoop in one of those hats... or wearing one of those "devices" which might be even better.

At 07 November, 2006, Blogger Peevish said...

Oh man, now I have a mental image of Hoop in a nurse's uniform.....

At 07 November, 2006, Anonymous mamatulip said...

Like, nursing BABIES?


At 07 November, 2006, Blogger Chelle Y. said...

Once again, "winner" conversations! Haha!

At 07 November, 2006, Anonymous Lily said...

Oh, Tink. I am caught between poll watching and handing out leaflets like a dork again which I swore I would not do.

For some reason, I find your crazy life oddly... "escapist". Makes me laugh. It also comforts me to know that others must live with crazy men. Having a cell phone and a crazy man is even worse! Do you get pictures of his ass yet???(snort) Give it time. Hoop sounds like an ass clicker. (Does that sound bad? Its not...)

You wont be homeless. You can live at the petting zoo.

Although if my hubby tried to take me to orlando for my anniversary I would SO protest. A few months ago I was in Celebration and that creeped me out, ever see Shrek and the city of Duloc??

At 07 November, 2006, Blogger Jay said...

Nursing babies. LOL ... Along with the white hats he could wear the white nurses dress and the white stockings. Or mabe just be a candy striper?

At 07 November, 2006, Blogger Newt said...

Giggle - snort - giggle some more. Conversations too funny! I hear nursing does pay well. And I think Hoop would look fantastic in a nurses uniform. White stockings and all...

So, I guess you have to say "Play Doctor" for a guy to understand? ha ha ha.

At 07 November, 2006, Blogger Lucia said...

Hoop should keep this letter...one never knows...he might need it someday.

At 07 November, 2006, Blogger Mike Y said...

LOL! That cracks me up about the nursing degree. :)

But boobs on the back or head is just wrong! ;)

At 08 November, 2006, Blogger Chris said...

You should do a book of Hoop conversations. Damn, they're funny!

At 08 November, 2006, Blogger graymama said...

Male lactation can and does happen, actually. I know someone on-line who couldn't breastfeed for health reasons, so her husband did. Pretty cool!

As for boobs on your back, hugs were the last thing on my mind. Nice to know Hoop has such innocent thoughts :-)

At 08 November, 2006, Blogger Rude Cactus said...

Nursing? Lactating men? Sheesh, I'm going to have nightmares.

At 14 November, 2006, Blogger mrspao said...

All I can think of is 'Meet the Fokkers'


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