Friday, November 03, 2006

So Ends Another Episode

Daily Hoop Conversation:
Tink: I have an idea for my costume next year.
Hoop: Oh yeah?
Tink: I'm going to wear my clothes backwards and then brush my hair forward so I can wear a ponytail off my forehead.
Hoop: Oh-kay.
Tink: Then I'm going to put a mask on the back of my head and walk backwards... Do you think that will freak people out?
Hoop: Probably. You're freaking ME out just talking about it.
Tink: They'll be like, "Oh no! Which side is the front of her?"
Hoop: You could call yourself "Confucianism."
Tink: Yeah! That's perfect.
Hoop: I was joking.
...
Hoop: And you're just joking too, right?

Around The Water Cooler:
Tink: Mmm. What kind of cologne are you wearing?
Coworker: Curve.
Tink: It's smells really good. That reminds me of a story.
Coworker 2: *Turns to listen*
Tink: You know how you're not supposed to fart in the shower?
Coworker: This is the story my cologne reminded you of?! Thanks a lot.
Tink: That was just the lead-up.
Coworker 2: This should be good.
Tink: You don't fart in the shower because somehow the water and the steam mixture makes it really really stinky, right?
Coworker: Yeah.
Tink: So Hoop comes in this morning while I'm showering and he sprays on his cologne and then he leaves. Suddenly, I can't breathe. I have two choices. I can run out into the cold air to open the door, or I can use what little air I have left to yell at him.
Coworker 2: Choices, choices.
Coworker: So what did you do?
Tink: I used up my air, of course. The point of my story is... Shit, I forgot the point.
Coworker 2: Well, that was educational.
Coworker: Glad I could spur that lovely memory Tink.
Tink: I'm sorry guys. I'll let you know if I remember the point, Ok?

October Hit Statistics:
1. The leading countries for visits on my blog were the US and Canada.
2. The primary day for hits was Monday.
3. The most popular hour being 4pm.
4. The top referrers were Mignon and Alien.
5. The most used search term was, "where's waldo costume."
6. My favorite search terms were, "alanis morissette peeing in a cup," and "Have you seen your stepdads penis?"
7. The highest hit post (224) was on October 30th, the day I answered everyone's questions.

31 Quirks for 31 Days:
1. I've always believed myself to be a fairly level-headed person.
2. Evidently that doesn't apply to mornings where I haven't gotten enough sleep or coffee.
3. Someone had dumped dead bugs in the toilet yesterday before I went to use it. As I reached over to flush, and happened to get a good glance into the bowl, I was momentarily confused and then panicked by the thought that maybe I had pissed them out.
4. I'm really good at talking on the phone with strangers...
5. ...but not so hot when it's with someone I know.
6. I never let my gas tank get below the 1/4 line.
7. Once, when I was very little, my Mom and I started to run out of gas on the freeway. She told me to, "Pray." I remember squeezing my eyes shut and whispering "Don't run out of gas" over and over again.
8. And we didn't.
9. I haven't prayed since... But I wish on stars and tossed coins more often than I can count.
10. When I was ten someone told me, "It takes seven years for a wish on a falling star to come true."
11. So I wished for a car.
12. The word "Burple" (Blue-Purple) cracks me up.
13. Now that I have long hair, I have no idea what to DO with it.
14. I hope I don't have ugly kids.
15. Because I know I hate telling people their babies are cute when in reality they look more like hairless monkeys.
16. You're all wondering if you're kids are really that cute now, aren't you?
17. They are. Otherwise I wouldn't have said anything.
18. I have never seen Hoop cry...
19. ...or throw up.
20. Which leaves the score at Tink 10, Hoop 0.
21. Sometimes I start things just for the feeling of satisfaction when I finish.
22. I do NOT think Disney World is the happiest place on Earth.
23. Canada is.
24. Have you EVER met an unhappy Canadian?
25. The only time I feel sad about leaving my house is when Hoop and I are sitting outside. Some of our best conversations (and arguments) have happened on that side stoop.
26. Funny isn't it? The part that's more valuable, the inside, holds so much LESS value to me.
27. I'm a pretty easy person to shop for. I don't request much, and it's usually inexpensive.
28. Like this year for Christmas I want a new cookie pan.
29. The only one I own is four years old, rusted, and came from the dollar store. I can't use it without putting two layers of foil on it first.
30. One week after moving in, Hoop dubbed it "The Great Pan."
31. Almost all of the names I use in my stories have befitting meanings to the characters or situations they're attached to.
32. Except "Anabar." I just liked the way that one sounded.
33. "ANABAAAAAAR."

(UPDATED TO INCLUDE)
Courtesy of
Odd Mix:

The words for this weekend are...

Enduring
Ephemeral


I don't even know what that last word means, but I'm sure it's something tricky. Thanks OM *eye roll*.

Have a great weekend everyone!

17 Comments:

At 03 November, 2006, Anonymous Anonymous said...

NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

You can't leave us not knowing what the point was! That's just wrong.

Fine, then. I will torture you with difficult words for the weekend.

 
At 03 November, 2006, Blogger Jay said...

I guess we could make up our own point to that converstation. But, that would make me think too much and that would make my head hurt.

I have too much troulbe walking forward like a normal person. I'm pretty I couldn't walk backwards all night.

 
At 03 November, 2006, Blogger Mignon said...

I think your point was, You smell pretty good, but stay out of my shower or I may suffocate. Which is a wonderful point to make, after you've pissed out five flies and a moth with one wing.

The only unhappy Canadian I ever saw had Parkinson's and was being mocked on national radio by Rush Limbaugh. And even that Canuck didn't seem that bummed about it...

 
At 03 November, 2006, Blogger Tink said...

Oddmix: Oh great. Not only are you punishing ME, but everyone else is going to be mad because they get punished too. I feel like I'm back in grade school eating paste. ;)

Chelle: Who are you trying to fool? You would have made a beautiful baby too.

Jay: Or I could walk forward which would make people THINK I was really walking backward, but how in the world would I wear my shoes? Is your head any better?

Mignon: "Which is a wonderful point to make, after you've pissed out five flies and a moth with one wing." *Gasp* How did you know?! It was you who put them in the toilet wasn't it?

 
At 03 November, 2006, Blogger Betty said...

I pretty much think all babies look like Winston Churchill. Except for my two, of course. They were both beautiful.

 
At 03 November, 2006, Blogger Arabella said...

Since becoming pregnant, I have lived in fear of producing funny-looking children.

 
At 03 November, 2006, Blogger J-Funk said...

I never knew you weren't supposed to fart in the shower, but I always wondered why farting in the shower always knocks me out. Now I will remember, it's best to not fart in the shower.

 
At 03 November, 2006, Blogger EE said...

I always love your 31 quirks for 31 days. :)

About your hair grown out. That happened to me. I ended up wearing it up or pulled back like 99% of the time and it was like "I grew out my hair WHY?!" LOL

 
At 03 November, 2006, Blogger Andrew Fletcher said...

Around the water cooler was excellent today. Wise words. You know those folks are going to fart in the shower the first time they get a chance. Won't they be sorry!

...babies are cute when in reality they look more like hairless monkeys. I've always said screaming red aliens but hairless monkeys is a little nicer.

BTW I'm troubled with people searching for "have you seen your stepdad's penis". That's just wrong...way wrong.

Have a great weekend.

 
At 04 November, 2006, Blogger Kell said...

Not only will your babies be beautiful, but they will grow up to be witty and intelligent people. I have no doubt.

 
At 04 November, 2006, Blogger Gracey said...

How long does it take you to think up all of these things? I'd be sitting around all day trying to think of 31 quirks...guess I'm not quick enough. :0

Here is a question...what are you supposed to do the the word challenge anyway? I haven't figured that one out yet either. :)

 
At 04 November, 2006, Blogger Newt said...

Too funny - around the watercooler.
I really enjoyed the 31 quirks. Good to know you still can't stop at 31. More for me to read :-) You could dress up on both sides and wear a mask on the back. Perhaps good tink and evil tink? (Of course the evil tink will have the goatee :-)

 
At 04 November, 2006, Anonymous Anonymous said...

OK I'm the idiot responder because I never heard of this shower thing and cannot imagine a person leaving bugs in a toilet for somebody else to have to look at.

I mean, you throw them in...and WHAT happens to interrupt the next step? The phone rings? What?

 
At 04 November, 2006, Blogger gawilli said...

I had to look up Ephemeral to make sure it meant what I thought.

Great Halloween pictures. Guess I missed a few days...

 
At 05 November, 2006, Blogger Chris said...

I hope you remembered the point over the weekend!! The suspense is killing me here.

And... were you kidding? About the costume for next year? ;)

 
At 06 November, 2006, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Farting in the shower reminds you of your co-worker's cologne. Priceless.

 
At 06 November, 2006, Anonymous Anonymous said...

i'm telling you ... those farts marinated in the shower water are RAUNCHY!

e+

 

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