Freaks On Parade

There's nothing quite like Halloween...

The crazy costumes.
The instant cavities.
Scaring people at Chick-fila.

8:00pm: As the Devil (played by Hoop) and his fallen Angel (played by Tink) walked into the most Christian eating establishment in the U.S., everything grew quiet. The girl sweeping the foyer didn't know if she should laugh or be offended. "I'd like two number 5's," Hoop bellowed. The manager behind the counter averted her eyes. "This is it," I thought. "They're going to kick us out." But instead they just got us our meals. In fact, I've never seen a fast food staff work so quickly! "Have a BLESSED night," the manager said loudly as we made our exit, an extra emphasis on the word "blessed."

8:30pm: "So... We're really going to do this?" I asked Hoop as we stared across his Grandma's street. "Sure! Why not?" "Oh-kay. But you have to be the one that knocks." As we climbed the steps to the brightly lit house, I found myself trying to quiet my footfalls. I felt more like a burglar than a trick-or-treater. "Aren't we missing the TP?" I whispered. Hoop knocked. "Trick-Or-Treat!" We yelled, and then burst into laughter. The guy who answered the door squinted for a moment as his eyes adjusted. Then he started chuckling. "Look at you two!" He grabbed his candy dish and came out to get a better look. "You guys in high school?" I could feel myself blushing. "Nah. I'm a 29 year old working man," Hoop declared proudly. "I wish I was still a 29 year old working man." The guy replied.

The woman at the next house started laughing as soon as she looked outside, and only stopped long enough to throw us a couple of glow bracelets and close the door in our faces. The following house was well lit, but no one answered when we knocked. Then we noticed the empty bowl on the steps, a sign inside that read "Please take one." I think some people forget they're dealing with KIDS. Kids don't understand moderation, especially when the goods are free and for the taking. The last house we made a stop at was cleaning up for the evening. The gentleman filled our Walmart bags with two huge handfuls and complimented our costumes. "I don't even want the candy," Hoop said as we walked to the car. "That's OK. We didn't do it for the candy anyway."

9:00pm: Down town looked like a parade of freaks. There were fairies, clowns, cat-people and witches. Even the bums took initiative and dressed up! The most disturbing display came from a group of guys wearing nothing buy panty hose. "I'd take a picture, but I'm afraid the flash would make the stockings see-through," I said. People complimented our costumes as they gave us a wide berth on the street. And some didn't quite understand the correlation. "I'm the angel he corrupted!" I called out to a pair of confused drunks. Then the streets began to clear and we headed for the beach.

10:00pm Beachside was an orgy of color and sights. The moment we stepped foot in the bar I felt as if I'd entered Jereth's castle. You know... Labyrinth? God, David Bowe was hot back then. I ran around the bar for an hour just taking pictures. By eleven the place was too crowded for me to fit my wings through, and Hoop's red paint had begun to run. It finally took my fake eyelashes falling off before I conceeded to go home though. "Is the Devil ready to go back to the depths of Hell yet?" I called out, blinking back the glue induced tears.

11:00pm: "Is it off yet?!" Hoop called from the shower. I glanced at his pink face for a minute before sending him back in for his third scrub down. Three showers and half a bottle of shampoo later, Hoop was noticeably cleaner, but not fully back to normal color. "It'll have to do." By midnight we were both back to being human. I vowed never to wear three inch heels down town again and Hoop started making plans for next years revisions.

Daily Hoop Conversation:
Tink: How's your skin color today?
Hoop: Well... The ladies at work thought I had a rash.
Tink: *Snort* That bad huh?
Hoop: They gave me lotion.

Daily Hoop Conversation 2:
(While walking down town in costume)
Lady: *Glances at Hoop* Satan.
Tink: Evening.
Lady: Evening. You know, you're hanging out with the wrong kind of guy.
Tink: *Laughs* Oh yeah?
Hoop: *Nods to lady* Thank you. I'll be seeing YOU later.

Tink Quote Of The Day:
Halloween must be a dentist's wet dream.

DOT: Twisted Tink has been updated with a new chapter, "All That Glitters." See what happens below Rapunzel's tower!

Stop by tomorrow to see Hoop and my Halloween pictures!