I don't think about anything when I'm sitting on the toilet.
I get in. I get done. I get out.
Evidently I'm not utilizing my time well enough.
"I'm off to the Thinking Room!" One of the sales guys yelled yesterday as he walked into the restroom. I think my mind is too impressionable. One little comment and suddenly that's all I can think about. It doesn't help that my office is right next to the men's bathroom.
Now when two or more guys go in I can't help but wonder... "Are they having a meeting?" A manager comes over to spout off some great idea and my first reaction is, "Why was he thinking about ME while doing THAT?"
So this morning I'm sitting on the can, trying to think, and nothing is happening... from either end. Maybe I can't multi-task? "Think about the story you're writing," I told myself. So I did. Well, I tried. It took five minutes before I realized I was counting the number of kingdoms I'd already introduced into the fable.
It's five if you're curious.
"Well that's stupid. They'd have to be right next to each other. It would be like a castle multiplex!" Five minutes after that, "Then again, my two main characters are a fairy and a wolf. I mean, which is more absurd? I knew I should have wrote a murder mystery instead. Ah, it'll be fine." Then I pulled up my pants and left the restroom.
I got all the way back to my office before I realized something... I'd forgotten to poop.
How does one FORGET to poop?!
October Search Terms:
(What people put into search engines that bring them here)
1. Waldo decoy pop out Halloween Is that so the real one can get away with the loot?
2. office zombie That's me before I'm filled up with coffee.
3. what are a pickled boobs Um... I think you need to take your medication now.
4. i'm boobless It could be worse. You could have innies.
Courtesy of Odd Mix:
The words for this weekend are...
I double dog dare you.
Around The Water Cooler:
Sales Manager: I can't get this to print!
Tink: I'll be right over.
Sales Manager: *Click, click, clickclickclick*
Sales Manager: I don't understand! I'm hitting the "Print" button.
Tink: So you went to "File," then "Print" and-
Sales Manager: -No. There's a print button ON the screen.
Tink: What? *Leans over and looks at the screen* That's not going to do you any good.
Sales Manager: Why not? It worked when I clicked it on the web page.
Tink: But this is a Word document.
Sales Manager: So?
Tink: And this thing you keep clicking on?
Sales Manager: Yeah?
Tink: It's a print screen
In Other News: Wednesday night Hoop's car broke down on the side of the highway. This wasn't surprising to me. It had been overheating for two days. Hoop on the other hand acted as if the car were merely having a bad moment. "It'll start right back up. It just needs some water and to sit for a couple minutes." So I sat, white knuckled as the semi-trucks rushed by, waiting for Hoop's miracle. To my disbelief, it started up on the first try. I followed him to the next exit, my leg shaking so bad on the pedal I thought I was running out of gas. $400 and a new water-pump later, Hoop's car (Christine, as I call her) is back in commission. I'm just waiting to see what else this week is going to throw my way before Saturday.
Have a wonderful weekend!