Wednesday, February 07, 2007


If my brain were put on auction right now... would sell for little more than a tub of Jello.

Despite my sporadic commenting, my lack of pictures and decent posts, you all have continued to stick by me. I can't begin to express how grateful I am. I promise when this is all over, I'll post a keg party. No RSV required, and togas optional.

Rantings Of A Mad Woman: When I was younger I couldn't wait to be an adult. I thought it would be so easy! You get a car. You get a great paying job. You meet the person of your dreams, have some kids, move into a nice house, and as long as nothing horrible happens to you (like a natural disaster or a stock market crash) you'll end up retiring in a mansion somewhere with tons of money to spend.

And then there's reality...

Do you know who I blame?

Milton Bradley.

Unlike the game of
LIFE, there aren't magic dice to roll every time you have to make a decision. You don't move forward on some clear and defined path that places you neatly at "Retirement" when you're done. You can't land on a designated spot, pick up a peg, and have an instant family. In the real world pink and blue pegs don't always pick opposite colored pegs. Sometimes they pick pegs of the same color, or no pegs at all. And sometimes (in Utah) a blue peg will marry TWO pink pegs at the same time and have lots of little peg babies.

But that's besides the point.

Life, the real one, is not user friendly. It may say that it's "meant for all ages," but IT decides what age you stop playing at. There's no manual or shortcuts. There's no way of cheating the odds. The banks in real life aren't guarded by your little brother. Your punishment won't be getting tackled or tickled if you get caught robbing it. We don't all start off with cars and we don't all end up in the same place. I'm not saying the game should be entirely realistic. There's no need to add ghettos or penalty cards saying, "Get a divorce. Lose half your bank roll."

What I suggest is a name change. Maybe to "Fantasy" or "Bullshit." Or better yet...

"Life: or something NOT like it."

That way on days like this one I wouldn't ask:
Tink: "Can't we do this another day?"
Coworker: Do what another day?
Tink: Life.
Coworker: I wish it were that easy.
Tink: It used to be.

Tomorrow: Updates, if my brain has finally demushified.



At 07 February, 2007, Blogger Newt said...

You know, I would give anything to write as beautifully and articulately as you do with a mushy brain no less. Dang. You have a gift girl. That was a beautifully written post. I love it! And one of the things that "real" life gives you that the board game doesn't : friends like you. :-)

At 07 February, 2007, Blogger Jay said...

Newts right. You should be writing for a major magazine. Your writing is just so damn good.

But, if life went exaclty the way we planned it, wouldn't it be boring. We would never be tested, never have to improve ourselves or anything like that. We also couldn't separate people who CAN from those who CAN'T.

At 07 February, 2007, Blogger Tink said...

Newt: *Blush* I certainly don't feel creative today. I feel like I have peg people throwing a party in my head.

Jay: >>But, if life went exactly the way we planned it, wouldn't it be boring?<< I think I would have planned for excitement and surprises... But only the good ones. ;)

At 07 February, 2007, Anonymous Turtle said...

Too insightful, Tink. Sounds like something I would have posted if I had the time. Your writing is great, so don't think that. Keep it up. Even the mundane is interesting...depending upon your individual perspective. And I say you and Foo have definitely got a piece of the market that original and individual. Keep on writing, gf! You rock!!!

At 07 February, 2007, Blogger fiwa said...

I hope this doesn't signify anything bad about the house? I know what you mean though, sometimes you follow all the rules and life still doesn't work out the way it's SUPPOSED to.

Keep your chin up.

At 07 February, 2007, Blogger Chris said...

Brilliant. If I was half as eloquent at full capacity as you are at mush level, I would be very happy!

At 07 February, 2007, Blogger meno said...

Mush. Now i feel like making some oatmeal.

Of the game were realistic one of the cards would say "Get a divorce, lose most of your money and try to survive with a broken heart and a small child to take care of."

Bitter, oooh.

At 07 February, 2007, Blogger EE said...

A clear path would sure be nice. Smoother sailing....*that's* for sure!

At 08 February, 2007, Blogger Gracey said...

When I was five, I would tell my mom that I couldn't wait to be independent. I don't think I fully understood the word but I was ready to be an adult at the age of five. I had quite a surprise in store for me when I finally did get completely out on my own after college. There is always going to be ups and downs throughout this life, just remember you'll get through the down parts and be stronger because of them! Keep up that chin of yours; we are all rooting for you!! :)

At 08 February, 2007, Anonymous OddMix said...

Tink, you rock! Your writing - and the thought behind it - is insightful well beyond your years.

Sometimes I say, "Can't we just cancel the rest of this week due to lack of interest?" But nobody ever seems to get around to the canceling.

At 08 February, 2007, Blogger Laurasia said...

Lol @ "The banks in real life aren't guarded by your little brother."

For me, it was my big brother, but man did that bring back some memories. Girl, life sure did seem like it had a pretty bright crystal clarity back then huh?

I remember the only thing I wanted to be in life was a cashier, because scanning was just too much fun with my playskool set.

At 08 February, 2007, Anonymous susan said...

Ah Tink...what's the fun of living in a perfect little gameboard world? From everything you've been telling us you are dodging all the hurdles that have been thrown at you with grace and humor.

All those bad days, they just make you stonger and show you how awesome the good days are.

At 08 February, 2007, Blogger Chelle Y. said...

Milton Bradley is the name of a guy who plays for the A's. I thought you meant him at first! Haha! I got so used to his name, that I forgot it was actually a man that invented some games. :)

At 08 February, 2007, Anonymous TB said...

If it makes you feel any better, I sent you a package today. Should be at your doorstep by Monday.

At 08 February, 2007, Blogger Kell said...

How do you do that? How do you take the things I think and put them in an eloquent, wonderful, meaningful post. I didn't even know that's what I thought--it was just some misty feeling somewhere.

Great post.


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