Monday, January 22, 2007

Going Postal

Weekend Recap:
1. Friday night I turned into a black hole of unhappiness...
2....sucking up everyone else's good cheer around me.
3. It was horrible, like watching a train wreck.
4. Only, I was driving the train.
5. Statistics say that January 24th is the unhappiest day of the year.
6. People are starting to pay back what they owe for Christmas. There are no more celebrations. Unreasonable resolutions have been broken, and the winter weather is starting to get old.
7. Which makes sense. But I think my "unhappy day" came early this year.
8. Don't worry. I'm over it now. It's time to for an attitude tune-up.
9. Saturday morning we were visited by aliens my Grandfather from Phoenix.
10. We never quite know how to act when he's around.
11. In his prime, my Grandfather worked for the CIA. After that it was on to fortune 50 companies. Now, at an age where most would retire, he's an investor in a high profile golf company.
12. Although sweet, he's a little detached from normal life. He has no idea what things cost or how to take care of himself in the most rudimentary ways. Doing laundry or making a sandwich boggles his mind.
13. When my Mom was 18, he divorced my Grandmother so he could marry his secretary. They later adopted two girls, my aunts. They are 17 and 19 now.
14. As a way of relating to me and my life, my Grandfather brought up that my 19 year old aunt will be closing on a house next month.
15. A brand new house. One which she'll have to pay nothing on.
16. The black hole part of me wanted to say something snotty, diminishing the happiness he felt with my misery.
17. But I didn't. Because I realized a huge part of that misery was actually sadness on the behalf of my aunt. Something he couldn't have understood.
18. How do you love a house that didn't take blood, or sweat, or tears to get? How do you build strength and pride if you don't ever have to exert yourself?
19. One of the most defining moments of my life happened on the floor of my kitchen, barely three months into buying my house. I was sobbing, torn between gratitude and the terror of failure. "This is MINE." I kept telling myself. "And I could lose it all."
20. Sunday, Hoop and I escaped from my parents' house for a football party thrown by his boss.
21. She had the food prepared, the game on, the beer chilled, and the guests had all arrived...
22. Unfortunately, she'd been drinking since 11 and went MIA 30 minutes into the game.
23. So we all went outside and played a competitive round of
Baggo.
24. The pressure was so intense that by the last round I fully expected a fight to break out.
25. But it didn't... and we won.
26. Of course we didn't think to consult the handbook until AFTER the game, in which we realized we'd been playing it all wrong.
26. So much for Hoop and I becoming professional Lame-O Baggo players. I guess it's back to our dreams of
Dodge Ball.

Around The Water Cooler:
Hoop: I don't want to go back to work tomorrow.
Hoop's boss: At least your desk has been cleaned for you.
Hoop: What's that?
HB: I took the liberty of going through everyone's desks and organizing them.
Hoop: Why?
HB: *Shrugs* It's just something I do.
Hoop: What about all those loose papers? I had those out because they weren't completed.
HB: Oh. Well, I filed those.
Hoop: *Grits teeth*
Tink: Wait a second. You go through your employees' desks?
HB: -And I organize them.
Tink: Girl... You're a freak.
HB: A NEAT freak.
Tink: No. You're just a regular freak.

Daily Hoop Conversation:
(After searching for Hoop's keys for 20 minutes)
Tink: Oh shit. *Starts laughing*
Hoop: Did you find them?
Tink: Yeah.
Hoop: Where were they?
Tink: On my key chain!
Hoop: That's great... I wish you would have realized that BEFORE we jimmied my car open.
(Five minutes later, after parting ways, I get a phone call)
Tink: Yes?
Hoop: Babe, do you have my cell phone?
Tink: Ummm. *Digs in purse* Yeah.

Hoop: What is this, I meet you for lunch and then you jack my shit?
Tink: I didn't want to leave!

Around The Water Cooler:
Coworker: I am so tired.
Tink: Rough night?
Coworker: We found a rabbit hidden in my son's closet last night.
Tink: Awwww.
Coworker: No, not "awww". He did it after my wife and I both told him he couldn't have it.
Tink: Are you worried he can't take care of it?
Coworker: No. He's really good with animals.
Tink: Rabbits are a bit messy though.
Coworker: That's not it either.
Tink: OK. Then what's the big deal?
Coworker: Eventually the damn thing is going to die.
Tink: And that would make you... upset?
Coworker: No, I'd be fine. It's other people's grief I can't stand. It's the same reason I didn't want my wife getting a dog.
Tink: Wow. I had no idea you were so sensitive.

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22 Comments:

At 22 January, 2007, Blogger Gracey said...

Everybody's family is crazy, aren't they? How did your mom take your grandpa divorcing your grandmother for his secretary? That must have been really hard. I can see why it's hard to not know what to say or do around him.

You are totally right about your "aunt"....she won't appreciate anything unless she works for it first. I always have a sense of sadness for people that have the easy way through life. It's not going to be so easy when life bites them in the butt someday and they have to pull themselves up by their boot straps.

 
At 22 January, 2007, Blogger Foo said...

Well, I understand what you mean about not being able to love (well, appreciate) things you haven't had to spend any effort to acquire.

I think your family would make a great independent film. Just reading about your family structure makes me feel so... so... vanilla. So Ozzie & Harriet.

 
At 22 January, 2007, Blogger spellconjurer said...

can't believe I'm going to say all this, but I am. I love that I used to be broke. When I was first married. No longer in that boat, I still have friends that occasionally are. And I am a veritable encyclopedia of how to live broke. Can't pay your electric bill? I know just what number to call, what to say, how to get through that. Gas bill? check, got an answer. Mortgage co? ask me, I can probably offer some idea. Clothes for kids on a nearly zero budget? Need a car that runs for 200 bucks? Got it. Hate your couch your great-aunt gave you? I learned to recover furniture. Getting married at 19, having a baby at 20 and living on one income comes with a lot of built in knowledge to be gained. Now that life is almost completely comfortable in that regard (that baby I had at 20, is now applying to the university in 5 months, and will be a Dr. upon graduation ACK, and the tuition is scaring me to death), I'm not afraid of a job loss, or an illness as much as someone else might be. I totally have the tools to cope with being broke. Lovely hm? I suppose I should be grateful or something. My parents were/are well off and mentioned exactly nothing about bills, credit, whatever as I was growing up. I never even wondered where money came from. My children know so much already. I mean, sliding your electric payment in the slot at 6am, so you have lights the next night, is a skill everyone should know. JUST in case. I totally bet Britney Spears doesn't know how to pay hers. Snort.

 
At 22 January, 2007, Blogger Chelle Y. said...

It's sad that many young people do not have to work for things that are of value anymore, like cars or houses. They really do not learn to appreciate it they way they would if they had actually paid for it (or some of it) by themselves.

That's cute about your "stealing" Hoop's stuff. You love him! :)

 
At 22 January, 2007, Anonymous susan said...

I can't get over the guy not letting his family have a pet because it's going to die someday...and he has to deal with someone else's grief. UGH! He needs to be whacked on the side of the head!

 
At 22 January, 2007, Blogger Chris said...

Not only a house, but education, etc. In college, the students who were paying their own way usually had the better grades, even though they had less studying time - it was their money and they knew what the alternatives were.

I'm glad you're feeling less blue!!

 
At 22 January, 2007, Blogger sassybead said...

Girl, I am totally convinced you are an old soul. You display far more wisdom than most people twice your age...and I love you for it! Thank you for a gentle reminder today. I'll remember it next time I'm envious of my friends who seem to have life so easy...

PS - Hoop's boss is a little bit scary! - and probably very nosy too.

 
At 22 January, 2007, Blogger EE said...

Ack....I've found myself in a black hole of unhappiness and it's like hard to put the brakes on. (((you)))

That is too cute that you 'jacked' all Hoop's shit. LOL!

The whole rabbit convo...um???? Okay.......

 
At 22 January, 2007, Blogger Sunshine said...

The story about your aunt reminds me of my college roommate. I paid my own way thru college, usually working 3 jobs at a time. And my roommate, well, she had college paid for (which is nice, good for her) but she also had an allowance which was supposed to be once a month to cover her expenses. Which was always gone in one week, which she'd call and say "daddy, can I have more money" and that was all it took.
Pissed.
Me.
Off.
But, to this day, I appreciate the fact that I busted my ass for my education and I don't know how much she gets how easy hers was.

 
At 22 January, 2007, Blogger Tink said...

Gracey: My Mom was the baby of her family. Right before divorcing, they yanked out the silver spoon and shoved her out on her own. It was tough. Three years later she had me and decided to start rebuilding. She's my favorite success story. :)

Foo: When I hear "independent film" and "family" I think of "Little Miss Sunshine." The scary thing is... I looked like that little girl when I was a kid. :D

Spellconjuror: EXACTLY! When it comes down to it, money doesn't equal survival. I would rather be poor and clever than rich and naive.

Chelle and EE: I do love him. Even if he brings out the inner-thief in me. hehe

Susan: I wish you could have seen the look of disgust on my face at the end of the conversation. I couldn't even think of anything else to say. I mean, what's the point of living then? Everything dies/deteriorates/changes eventually.

Chris: Four years of college and I'm still a Freshman... Paying class by class just doesn't work. I can't tell you how often my heart broke at friends who used their scholarship money for clothes or trips to Orlando.

Sassybead: Well, if my wrinkly hands are any indication. ;)

I adore you too Sass.

Sunshine: All I can think is... What happens when Daddy's gone? You will always know how to handle your own. In the end, I guess, what greater gift is there?

 
At 22 January, 2007, Blogger Mignon said...

I'm really just speechless. Someone went to a store and actually spent money on Baggo???

 
At 22 January, 2007, Blogger graymama said...

Okay, I am outing myself here. I grew up with $. What did I learn? Money does NOT buy happiness. Our home was dysfunctional in every way except financially.

Couldn't Hoop's boss get in trouble for going through everyone's things?!

Sending you some happy day vibes :-)

 
At 22 January, 2007, Blogger meno said...

I love how the hostess disappeared 30 minutes into the party. Think she might have a problem?

Giving a house to someone that age is just wrong. How will they ever understand the terror and joy of buying their own first house?

 
At 22 January, 2007, Blogger Jay said...

I'm just amazed at how normal ... ERRRR .... boring my family is when I read about yours.

People actually play baggo? I didn't know that.

You're coworkers sensitivity is just sooo sweet. haha

 
At 22 January, 2007, Blogger Betty said...

That boss is just plain nosy. But, think of the opportunities for Hoop to stock his desk with things that will embarras or frighten her.

 
At 22 January, 2007, Blogger Tawcan said...

Interesting long read. Your co-worker is definitely sensitive. Is this good or bad? Hard to say, but I think kids need to face problematic situations from time to time in order to learn.

 
At 23 January, 2007, Blogger mjd said...

Wow, Tink this a jammed pack entry. You have some interesting people in your life. Or maybe we all have interesting people in our lives; you just notice how interesting people are...grandad, nosey boss, compassionate? co-worker.

I hope that your week is full of good cheer.

 
At 23 January, 2007, Blogger Pamer said...

it's strange, i was watching Dexter on HBO last night (a repeat) and he said the same thing your co-worker said about 'having a hard time dealing with grieving people'...he didn't mind the death though. Dexter is a serial killer though...makes me wanna tell you to stay clear of co-worker LOL

 
At 23 January, 2007, Blogger Tink said...

Mignon: I think it was a Christmas present. In which case, it's better than the angel head butter spreaders I got one year.

Graymama: That's a surprise! You are one of the most appreciative people I know. Maybe I shouldn't be so stereotypical eh?

Meno: She said it was just a "headache." Uh huh.

Jay: Your family may be normal... But you, my dear, are not. Hehe

Betty: Anyone know where to get a really realistic looking snake or spider?

Tawcan: Rightly said!

MJD: Interesting? Wow, you're being nice. Usually we/I'm called... Well, I wouldn't want ruin your opinion. ;)

Pamer: Greeeeat. I think I'll skip the lunch meeting today.

 
At 23 January, 2007, Anonymous mamatulip said...

I think you're right. Having to work for something, to want something so bad you can taste it, really makes you appreciate it more. It's that sense of success, that swish of pride when you look around and can say to yourself that YOU DID IT.

 
At 23 January, 2007, Anonymous Lily said...

I'm sorry, Tink. I can relate, as my two stepsisters have everything and never had to work at all. I;ve always worked.

But you know what? No shame in that.

 
At 26 January, 2007, Blogger mrspao said...

I get really annoyed with pao's dad because he treats pao differently from his other kids. It drives me a bit mad. HUG!

 

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