Friday, January 12, 2007

Unleash Your Inner Stalker

I dub thee "Delurking Day!"

Come out, come out, wherever you are! Go ahead, tell me what you think. I'll accept all forms of praise, hate mail, and general suggestions as to what additions you'd like to see in 2007. But please refrain from throwing tomatoes. Chocolate, on the other hand, is OK.

House Update: Wednesday night my family and I sat around the inspection forms, adding and subtracting repairs from our priority list. With each little check I felt my stomach tighten. "You're going to need to replace the roof in three years." "I don't think you can afford to get those popcorn ceilings scraped." "Did you read this? It says there's no electricity running to the dryer!" I was surrounded by people, and I felt so alone.

In my corner I had the concerned parent, the wannabe expert, and the guy more concerned with the status of our flat screen TV than the stability of the actual house. Can you guess which one was which? Neither was very much help. By 11 o'clock that night I had hit my mental limit. And then Duff (the dog) ate my underwear... Funny how the smallest things can send you hurtling over the edge. In a stream of tears and profanity I started venting my frustration.

The tantrum began with my woes over clothes, and ended with, "..and then all my teeth are going to rot out. How the hell am I going to be able to afford a dentist? I can't even buy replacement underwear! Just hand me a pair of fucking pliers." I think I might have blacked out. Besides some faulty wisdom teeth I've needed removed for two years, my hygiene is really good. I swear!

The next morning I woke up with Julia Robert's lips, and my eyes looked like they'd been stung by a bee. The situation was dismal... at best. So I decided to email a friend, one far wiser and more level headed than I (Thank you, again. You know who you are). After that, things started to fall into place. Issues were fixed. Loan options were readjusted. I fell into a plan that would not only work, but leave me with extra cash to work with.

If all goes according to plan, Hoop and I should have a new house by mid-February. Of course my sanity might be gone by then and my hair might have turned prematurely white with stress. But at least we'll have a home!

Daily Hoop Conversation:
(On two-ways)
Tink: Babe, Jesus is looking at me.
Hoop: WHO is looking at you?
Tink: Jesus. Oh and Santa, Frosty, a Reindeer, and three black wise men.
Hoop: Oh-kay.
Tink: This truck in front of me is carrying a whole yards worth of holiday decorations.
Hoop: Must be an after Christmas sale.
Tink: Or he's taking them to storage. It looks like the decorations are having a party.
Hoop: That's the oddest party I've ever heard of.

Courtesy of
Odd Mix:

The words for this weekend are...


If I actually get a free moment this weekend, I'll be dedicated to participating.

Out And About:
(Talking with the sweet, little old lady who works at the gas station)
Tink: What are you doing?
Attendant: Dancing.
Tink: Cute.
Attendant: Our DM says we don't greet people friendly enough.
Attendant 2: Whatever you're on honey, I want some.
Attendant: I'm on ----.
Tink: What's that for?
Attendant: It's so I don't kill people!

January Search Terms:
(What people put into search engines that bring them here)
1. Permission to pee electric Granted. Just don't blow my fuses.
2. Sleep talking secrets My lips are sealed.
3. animal scratching up carpet underneath trailer Why do you have carpet underneath your trailer?
4. take over home depot
I've thought about it. But they have too many tools and weapons to fight back with.

Have a spectacular weekend!

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At 12 January, 2007, Blogger mamalujo1 said...


Wish it was in person.

One day.

At 12 January, 2007, Blogger Chelle Y. said...

Have a great weekend, Tink! I hope it is not stressful at all for you!

At 12 January, 2007, Blogger Foo said...

...general suggestions as to what additions you'd like to see in 2007.

I thought I had one, but since Duff ate your underwear, I'm all out.

I'm glad to hear things are progressing (however chaotically) on your new place. And I hope your teeth don't rot out.

At 12 January, 2007, Blogger spellconjurer said...

I know who the wiser friend is. A friend definately worth fighting to keep. I did. I'm so happy for you Tink. I'm thinking a picnic in the mountains. The wiser friend already knows about the plan. GIDDIAP!

At 12 January, 2007, Blogger EE said...

Damn dogs....I have had that happen before and it's always one of my FAVORITE pair too. How do they do they do that?! WHY do they do that?! Grrr...

(((Tink))) It sounds like it's working itself out. Hang in there chickie!

At 12 January, 2007, Blogger Newt said...

Have a spectacular weekend. Things really work out ok in the end. You've got a great head on your shoulders and despite the "help" a great family that will always support you in the end. Even if that support is half distracted by the big screen tv.

And you have us..........

At 12 January, 2007, Anonymous mamatulip said..., what a road you've been down these last few months. I hope this is the beginning of you being able to wrap things up and get to your new house!

At 12 January, 2007, Blogger Jay said...

Well at least it looks like it's going to work out for the house. That is cool. Hopefully it will go more smoothly from here out.

And I know they always say that Jesus is watching, but having him right there in front you really is a bit disturbing isn't it. Especially if he is frowning. That would really both me most.

At 12 January, 2007, Blogger Mouse said...

*coming out of lurk to throw chocolates* I had a dog that ate underwear off the drying line when I was a kid..

At 12 January, 2007, Blogger Tink said...

Mamalujo1: I bet you give great hugs.

Chelle Y: Me, stressed? Na! ;)

Foo: LMAO. You're awful! Don't make me sic Turtle on you.

Spellconjurer: Please tell me you're coming to kidnap me!! BTW, when the heck are you going to start a blog already? I keep clicking on your profile just in case...

EE: I've come up with a plan. I'm only going to buy ugly underwear from now on so he wont eat it. Hoop will just have to make do. :D

Newt: I'm thankful for you guys every day!

Mama T: I told Hoop yesterday, "If we have to move again, you might as well box me up with our stuff and unpack me when it's over." Don't worry. Yours is going to go MUCH smoother.

Jay: I was OK with Jesus. It was Frosty that was freaking me out. You can never tell where his coal eyes are looking!

Mouse: Welcome! Thanks for delurking, and for the chocolates. He ate them off the line? You mean... They were clean? Wow. That's totally undoglike behavior.

At 12 January, 2007, Blogger G said...

damn woman you make buying/selling a home look like a walk in the park ;) i hope the rest of it goes smoothly and quickly for you. I can't wait to hear stories of your new home.

At 12 January, 2007, Blogger Foo said...

Well you did say "unleash your inner stalker"... NARF!

At 12 January, 2007, Anonymous Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah said...

It is I, Goon Squad Sarah.

I read you in Bloglines because my eyes suck and you have really teeny tiny font.

At 12 January, 2007, Blogger Tink said...

G: Me too! There can't possibly be any more bad house selling/buying karma left in the universe for this year. I've eaten up the quota.

Foo: This is true... Alright, proceed.

Sarah: I'm sorry girl. I didn't realize my font was that tiny. Anyone else having problems? It's an easy fix!

At 12 January, 2007, Blogger mjd said...

That does sound like way too much stress. In February, you will be in your new home, and one by one you and Hoop will resolve the problems.

At 12 January, 2007, Blogger fiwa said...

*steps out of the closet*
Ok, I am delurking as well. I love your blog - it cracks me up. I have no suggestions for 2007 cuz it's great just like it is.

Good luck with your house!!


At 12 January, 2007, Anonymous susan said...

There's nothing like a good cry to make you feel better. Yeah, you end up looking like garbage but it lets the stress out.

The new house will be worth it in the end.

At 12 January, 2007, Blogger meno said...

buying a home is so awful, what with inspections and realtors and loan people.

hang in there.

At 12 January, 2007, Blogger Pamer said...

I hope you're feeling better now Tink.

Our home inspector told us we would need to replace our roof "in three years" too. That was 9 years ago, our roof is fine...and it has two feet of snow on it for four months a year.

I sincerely hope you get your dream home

At 12 January, 2007, Blogger Crashdummie said...

Wow Tink, you've managed to make me speechless, which is just as rare as watching pigs fly.. ;)

Have a fab weekend too!

At 12 January, 2007, Blogger Alien said...

Good luck with everything Tink! I really do hope everything works out for you!

Hey, I just had a thought... maybe you could hire the felon to do repairs around the house if you get it. He probably works cheap, no? ;)


At 13 January, 2007, Blogger Sunshine said...

I don't lurk, I comment. Bringing the love to my favorite pixie!

At 13 January, 2007, Blogger Stealth said...

I stalk, therefore I ... see you?

I am too stupid this morning to be out commenting.. LOL

At 13 January, 2007, Blogger Alex said...

Just saying hi!

At 14 January, 2007, Blogger mrspao said...

Hoooray! I'm so glad you found a house - please send your good house karma my way!

At 14 January, 2007, Blogger Pendullum said...

I do not lurk...
And I always try to comment... Tha't IF blogger will let me...

At 14 January, 2007, Blogger Peevish said...


At 15 January, 2007, Blogger Lucia said...

Breathe in. Breathe out.

Love the image in the Hoop conversation!

At 15 January, 2007, Blogger DebbieDoesLife said...

Hang in there! House stuff is scary and expensive!!!!

At 15 January, 2007, Anonymous lisa said...

Hey, I found you from Chris at Stumbling over Chaos. Where did you find catnip flavored bubbles? I don't consciously worry about my teeth falling out, but I sure do dream about it, and the hair too. Here's a question I've been wondering about lately--how do you know how people find your blog? Good luck with the house stuff.

At 15 January, 2007, Anonymous TB said...

You're in the home stretch! The whole process is so freaking nerve wracking and now you are 3/4 of the way there! Who-hoo! I'm so happy for you and also very jealous.

At 15 January, 2007, Blogger Adly said...

Delurking to say congrats on making progress with the house buying process! We bought our house, had the (dismal) inspection, and then negotiated a lower purchase price so we had an extra $20k to fix things that needed immediate attention. We ended up financing the same amount, but we had cash to make repairs. And we learned pretty quick how to do most of the projects we were going to have to pay people to do. :)


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