Memory Highway

Memory is a crazy woman that hoards colored rags and throws away food. ~Austin O'Malley

When I started preparing to move I thought of all the knickknacks I'd like to throw away: appliances that are never used and furniture too worn to keep. I assumed the only unsettling I would do was in dust, not memories. I've moved four times in the last five years. They were all difficult moves. Not like this one. This one feels easy. It feels right.

So why should this one be unearthing so many old memories? I sat around the house last night while Hoop was at school and thought back to a thousand little moments. I didn't think of old roommates or jobs or friends. I thought back to my childhood and that of my brothers. I remembered things I'd forgotten, and realized I'd forgotten a lot of the things I swore to remember. And then Hoop got home. I rambled off every memory I'd awakened. We laughed until we cried and then he kissed me... And then he thanked me.

The New Mommy: My youngest brother, Lil' Bit, was five when he decided he wanted a new Mommy. Instead of getting mad or feeling hurt, my Mom decided to play along with his temper tantrum. She picked up the phone and called information "Mommy's R Us." "What kind of Mommy would you like Lil' Bit?" She asked him. He stared at her in disbelief. "I want her to have BLUE hair!" He told her. Mom repeated his request into the phone. "And I want her to be YOUNG and NICE!" While he was rambling off his list of qualifications, Big Bit (who was almost seven at the time) and I snuck out the back door.

I will never forget the grin on Big Bit's face as we scrambled for the front door and rang the bell. "Your new Mommy is hear," Mom called out to him. We slapped our hands across our mouths to contain the laughter as Lil' Bit broke into screams and sobs on the other side of the door. "I was jus' kiddin'. I don't want a new Mommy!" he bawled loudly. Mom walked to the front door and swung it open as Lil' Bit threw himself into her legs and screamed in terror. "Look Lil Bit," Mom said. He turned around and stared at us, confused. And then it registered. Relief broke across his face and then rage. "I HATE YOU! I want a new family!" He screamed as we all burst into laughter.

May Search Terms:
(What people put into search engines that bring them here)
1. "Yodeling in the canyon of love" I prefer "Lapping the little man in the canoe." But whatever.
2. Sloppy don sandwich My mental images for this are not pretty.
3. Gatorade advertisement and "sperm" and "is it in you" and fastest
I feel like singing, "One of these things is not like the other!"
4. You might be ghetto if you have to put stuff on layaway at the 99-cent store.

Around The Water Cooler:
Co-worker: So I walked in and asked the supervisors why Hoop wasn't being made to run errands like all the other guys.
Tink: Wait... You did what?
Co-worker: I walked in and asked-
Tink: No, I heard you the first time. You do realize that Hoop and I are together right?
Co-worker: Yeah. Why?
Tink: It probably wouldn't be wise to trash talk him to me.
Co-worker: Oh?
Tink: Yeah. You know, for future reference.
Co-worker: But I thought I could talk to you about anything.
Tink: You're not very bright.

Daily Hoop Conversation:
(6:30 am, still in bed)
Tink: I just had the strangest dream!
Hoop: What's that babe?
Tink: We were building a deck. But because of this new law we had to go to the courthouse to pick up pre-approved blueprints.
Hoop: And then what happened?
Tink: We built a deck.
Hoop: Ok.
...
Hoop: And why is that strange again?
Tink: Um, I don't know exactly. But it was. Believe me.