Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Interview With A Vampire Satire

Questions from the wonderful and talented Mamalujo:

1. If you could meet some famous historical person (now dead), who would it be?

There are so many to choose from! That's like asking me which books I'd like to read before I die. My list of dead people to commune with would be: Da Vinci, Roald Dahl, Amelia Earhart, Douglas Adams, Anne Frank, Hans Christian Andersen... Wow, most of these are authors. Of course there's the generic answers like Napoleon, Cleopatra, Abraham Lincoln, Joan Of Arc, and Jesus. I don't think there's a dead person I wouldn't like to meet. Save for Hitler and such. Let's not resurrect murders thankyouverymuch.

2. What's the longest you've ever gone without taking a dump?

Seven days. I was vacationing in New York at the time. I have a problem with pooping on holiday. Apparently my body doesn't think it's necessary. After the sixth day I stopped eating, too afraid my body would explode with the pressure. Can you imagine? You're waiting in the subway, minding your own business, when suddenly the woman standing next to you combusts and showers you in shit. Lovely.

3. Have you quit smoking?

Sure! Twice. Am I smoking now? Unfortunately, yes. That is, until I can figure out a way to stop and NOT be tempted to kill everyone who looks, talks, or breathes at me. Hoop's Mom, a psychiatrist, keeps offering to hypnotise us. But I'm too afraid I'll walk out of her office clucking like a chicken or throw myself in front of a bus at the first unhealthy thought I have towards her son. They say you can kill one addiction with another. So far I'm just racking them up: coffee, books, movies, vibrators. I'm still working on it.

4. Do you go to church?

The last time I went to church was... eleven years ago. Unless you count the two minute wedding ceremony I attended back in 2002. But we were all counting the seconds until we could get drunk, so it wasn't exactly "holy." I tried being religious once. I wanted to believe in angels and heaven. Besides the whole Eve scam, I thought all the stories in the bible were pretty cool. And then that youth minister had to go and ruin it by telling me there were no such thing as dinosaurs. "How do you explain the gigantic bones?!" My thirteen year old self had asked. "Man created them," he explained. Then he asked me not to raise my hand again.

5. What do you consider to be your "signature" dish?

Hmm. I'm partial to my Marsala porkchops. Hoop likes my family recipe for chicken salad. I have a friend who raves about my spaghetti sauce. But desserts are my favorite thing to make. Cake cookies. Mini-cheesecakes. Mint chocolate chip cookies. Canollis. Man, I'm making MYSELF hungry!

Want to play? Leave a comment saying, "Interview me." I'll respond by asking you five personal questions so I can get to know you better. If I already know you well, expect the questions to be a little more intimate! Then you will update your journal/blog with the answers to the questions. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the post.

Be afraid. ;)

Courtesy of
Odd Mix:



(Some Random Weekend Pictures)

Barge At Sunset


"Strike A Pose!"

Pretend Video Gaming

That's the new TV that Nash is "playing" on.

Borrowing A Beat

Private Drive

Find a few more pictures

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At 20 March, 2007, Blogger J said...

Aww, you and Hoop are so cute. ;)
And I'm seriously digging that new TV.

At 20 March, 2007, Blogger G said...

you and Hoop are adorable...great picture of the two of you

Interview me :)

At 20 March, 2007, Blogger mamatulip said...

Can you guys be any cuter?

Interview me.

At 20 March, 2007, Blogger Alien said...

Ooo! Ooo! Interview me! :)

At 20 March, 2007, Blogger Jess Riley said...

At risk of sounding like a broken record, could you and Hoop be any more adorable?!?!

#4: man. I am continually baffled by people like that dinosaur-denier.

At 20 March, 2007, Anonymous Turtle said...

WTF First, man did not (I repeat) did not invent dinosaurs. No wonder you were brain washed.

Second, my favorite cooking is desserts as well. I make a mean (addicting) Oatmeal Chocolate Chip cookie. A recipe I got from one of my bestest gfs. Foo can attest to the fact that it's addicting. So will you share your Mint Chocolate Chip recipe? That's my fav ice cream.

Third, everyone's right. You two are cute. *hehe* Some lipsmaking thar.

Foo did not need to see the TV. We've got a few extra $, and he's been eyeing a grandfather clock. Next, it'll be a better tv. *sigh* Now, I'm going to need some help convincing him with the fact that we need a new bed first! Tink...help!

I'll answer your questions. I suppose I can post them on catmusings...even tho it's a cat blog. You like cats, right?

At 20 March, 2007, Blogger Kim: The Mom, The Myth said...

great pics!!

Me! Me! Interview me!

At 20 March, 2007, Blogger Jay said...

I would tell you how cute you guys are but everybody has already told you and I don't want this to get out of hand.

Man invented the dinos?? Is this BEFORE or AFTER Noah's flood created the Grand Canyon?

Okay what hell .... interview me.

Why do I feel like I'm going to be SO SORRY I said that? ;-)

At 20 March, 2007, Blogger Newt said...

Me too me too! Interview me!

Uh, you are so beautiful. I had to say it too!

Who gets the royalties on the whole dinosaur thing? Cause I want a chunk of that change! Ca-Ching!

At 20 March, 2007, Blogger Alex said...

I'd like to play the Interview Me game too, if you're still taking requests. :)

Love the pics!

At 20 March, 2007, Blogger fiwa said...

What cute pictures!
Your list of desserts made me hungry. Must.go.eat.carrot.sticks.

Oh yes, and I'd like to play too. Interview me please. And I am afraid. ;)


At 20 March, 2007, Blogger meno said...

You two are SO NOT cute.

Sorry, it's my contrary nature speaking. I just didn't want you to get a swelled head or anything, because, of course, you are stinkin' cute.

No interview, i'm afraid of what you might ask. Bawk bawk bawk.

At 20 March, 2007, Blogger Mary said...

Dude your St Patty's day was MUCH better than mine.......As usual love the pictures, the ones of you and Hoop are sweet :)

I love to cook and bake, but I hate to cook and prep work, so I never get creative. It sucks.

I dare you, interview me ;)


At 20 March, 2007, Blogger Mary said...

Oh and I Thought dinosaurs we just animals that are no longer like the kajillion other animals that have become extinct.....apparently to some they are a commercial product...

At 20 March, 2007, Blogger Chelle Y. said...

You two are adorable!

No, you would not want to interview me. I am a boring person! :)

At 21 March, 2007, Blogger Chris said...

I'm afraid. I'm very afraid....

But damn, free blog fodder. Ok, maybe...


Interview me...

You guys are just too damned cute for words!

At 21 March, 2007, Anonymous wordgirl said...

You two guys are just the CUTEST! Okay...public service announcement: stop smoking...because I care about you.

Now...Marsala pork chops sound heavenly. Please post the recipe and then...interivew me.

At 22 March, 2007, Anonymous susan said...

oh such sweet pictures. I like the little half smile on your face.

At 23 March, 2007, Blogger Ellie's Mommie said...

I'm so glad to hear that I'm not the only one who just doesn't understand some religious explanations.

After graduating from Sunday School, I decided I wanted to be baptized. The minister told me & my family he couldn't baptize me unless one of my parents became a member of his church! I was 8-years-old & decided that was just stupid. Haven't been back since.

At 26 March, 2007, Anonymous TB said...

You guys are really just too adorable and did I miss pictures of the house?
The TV is awesome and every guy has to have at least one toy like that. When we got our big TV, I tried to convince myself that it was just for Jeff and I didn't really care one way or another, but the truth is the picture is really nice and pretty and I find myself admiring it a lot.

Also, I totally feel you on the Satellite hookup deal. We had to wait around 6 hours on Friday to get ours but finally it's all set. Moving sucks and I truly hope I don't have to do this again for 20 years or so.


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