Monday, April 30, 2007

Filthy, In The Not Fun Way

Weekend Recap:
1. Friday night Hoop and I blew off plans to go drinking so we could stay home and clean up dog puke, dog diarrhea, and dog puke that looked like diarrhea.
2. No matter how much you drink while doing it, it's just not the same.
3. Later on, once we'd sobered, we went to get some grub:
Hoop: Whatcha hungry for?
Tink: Anything but chocolate pudding.
4. We settled for soup and salads. There's something about cleaning up vile substances that makes you want to eat something healthy.
5. Saturday morning I got up early and went to visit Hoop at work.
6. But I got lost in the process and ended up screaming "Fuck!" in his ear instead.
7. To be fair, I got lost using HIS directions, which always seem to rely heavily on the driver's ability to mind read.
8. While mid-panic, I text Hoop the question, "First right or left?"
9. He replied, "Yesterday."
10. *Blink*
11. That evening we watched "
A Clock Work Orange," a movie I'd always wanted to see but hadn't.
12. Fun Trivia:
  • Malcolm McDowell chose to sing "Singin' In The Rain" during the rape scene, because it was the only song he knew all the lyrics to.
  • Anthony Burgess originally sold the movie to Mick Jagger for $500 when he needed quick cash. Jagger intended to make it with The Rolling Stones as the droogs.
  • SPOILER: Despite its violent reputation, there is only one death in this film. Two, if you count Frank's wife, who died of Pneumonia.
    13. Sunday, Hoop and I spent the day ordering kitchen appliances and putting together furniture.
    14. Which probably sounds rather dull to you. But to someone who has been living out of boxes and bins for the last six months, it was Christmas.
    15. I spent an hour shining our dining room table, simply because I could.
    16. Later that day, after Duff had puked for what felt like the gazillionth time, I found the reason for his illness.
    17. Sometime over the past four days the dog had decided it would be fun to gobble up a plastic flag.
    18. At first I thought it was a tape worm, which really grossed me out since my method of searching involved using my bare hands.
    20. "Oh God. Oh God. Oh God." I chanted while pulling the strand from the pile.
    21. The good news is, he hasn't puked since. So cross your fingers he's on the road to recovery.

    Daily Hoop Conversation:
    Hoop: What was that?
    Tink: What?
    Hoop: That look you just shared with the waitress.
    Tink: I was trying to be friendly!
    Hoop: Uh huh.
    Tink: You got me Hoop. I was signaling for her to call me after she gets off work so we can get together and molest you.
    Hoop: Alright!

    Daily Hoop Conversation 2:
    (After reading
    THIS this article)
    Tink: I understand why she was upset. I just don't understand why she won't accept their explanation and apology.
    Hoop: She said why. She wants to be compensated with MONEY.
    Tink: It would be one thing if the company that printed the labels was English speaking. But they're not, and it doesn't seem like they meant to be derogatory.
    Hoop: Such is the world, babe.
    Tink: You know what's funny?
    Hoop: What?
    Tink: If I bought a couch with the label "Cracker White" on it, I would not be offended.
    Hoop: *Burst out laughing*
    Tink: I'd probably tear it off and frame it.

    Tomorrow: Prom Stories.
    Wednesday: WWC Pictures!

    Labels: ,


    At 30 April, 2007, Blogger Lucia said...

    I love your weekend recaps! Polish away dear! Looking forward to the prom stories.

    At 30 April, 2007, Blogger Newt said...

    The best part about a Monday is getting my weekend recap. You make my day!

    At 30 April, 2007, Blogger meno said...

    Somedays i wonder why we have pets.

    I hope next time you scream "fuck" in Hoop's ear, it's more fun!

    At 30 April, 2007, Blogger Maggie said...

    Tink I love the way you think. Cracker White - bwahahaha.

    I'd probably frame that too.

    Oh and how did it go in the end, with the waitress - heh.

    At 30 April, 2007, Blogger Heather said...

    I TOTALLY feel for you!! My cat threw up for three days last week!! It was so awful I often wondered to myself how long it would take to load all the animals up and drop them somewhere!! (Of course I would never do that... but it did cross my mind!!)

    At 30 April, 2007, Blogger Scottsdale Girl said...

    oooh we both had a "conversation re: bar staff" this weekend... mine will post later this week. Wait with baited breath mmkay? :)

    At 30 April, 2007, Blogger Jay said...

    You know, I love dogs and all, but if I had to spend all that amount of time cleaning up puke and doggie doo-doo I wouldn't have dogs anymore. I wouldn't hurt them, but I wouldn't keep them either. LOL

    I wouldn't be offended by a tag that said "crakcer white", but I would throw a bit old fit just so I could go on FOX News and get some publicity. ;-)

    At 30 April, 2007, Anonymous Anonymous said...

    Just too funny. Hoop is like a five year old ya know?

    Sometimes, your not much better.

    Add in adult bodies and that makes a hilarious combo!

    cracker white......I'm still laughing....

    You are my new best friend.

    Of the week.


    At 30 April, 2007, Blogger Chris said...

    I'm sure my weekends would be much more fun if you recapped them for me!! :)

    At 30 April, 2007, Blogger Nettie said...

    yes that's me and WTF are you waiting for???

    At 30 April, 2007, Blogger Chelle said...

    People will find anything they can to complain about to get money.

    We live in such a "sue them for all its worth" world, and I live in the worst state for it too. :)

    Love your recaps!

    At 30 April, 2007, Blogger mamatulip said...

    So - did you the movie?

    At 30 April, 2007, Blogger eric said...

    i once crapped out a penny that i swallowed at daycare.

    i can't remember if my mom put it in the piggy bank or not.

    At 01 May, 2007, Blogger EE said...

    My GOD!

    Chickie........this wk HAS.GOT. to be better.

    (and I just noticed MamaT's comment...."did you the movie?!!? hmmmmm......." LOL)

    At 01 May, 2007, Blogger Tawcan said...

    I sure hope your doggie feels better soon.

    At 01 May, 2007, Blogger Peggy said...

    Its cruddy when the dogs are sick. All I can think is "I hope the dog gets better soon or I'm going to be making an expensive trip to the vets". I love my pets, but trips to the vet cost money! If it had been my dog vomitting, I am so sure it would have meant surgery to remove the swallowed plastic bit.

    Your Daily Hoop Conversations are fantastic! I want to be in the booth next to you guys when I go out next to a restaurant.

    At 01 May, 2007, Blogger jinx protocol said...

    I can identify. I have a beagle who, anytime he eats people food, just absolutely has to poop in the house. There's no wiggle room. It's just go time. And, believe me, he's a lot more crafty when it comes to sneaking things he's not supposed to have than one would think. So, congrats on being such a good doggie parent. It takes a real woman to dig through doggie poop.

    At 01 May, 2007, Blogger Princess Banter said...

    LOL! That was quite an interesting read. Makes me want to wish I was part of it... in order to enjoy the humor and cleverness even more :P

    At 01 May, 2007, Blogger Lily said...

    OK, I'm prude maybe but why the bare hands???

    I would vomit causing a chain reaction whereby my whole family would vomit and like that scene in "Stand By Me" barfarama.

    I think in the end, its not a pet's fault since these are reactions to something wrong but damn what a lot of time!

    Glad you are settling in. Moving is shit.

    At 01 May, 2007, Blogger Tink said...

    Butterfly Girl: Hey, I resemble that remark! ;)

    Nettie: A sign. Just not a crop circle OK? Those look like they'd take FOREVER.

    Mama T: I enjoyed the movie. I'm glad Hoop forewarned me it was dark before we watched it though. It's one of those movies you have to be in the mood to watch.

    Eric: You are one talented mo'fo.

    Lily: No gloves. And if I have some, I have no idea which box they're packed in. Fortunately, I have a pretty tough stomach.

    At 02 May, 2007, Anonymous Anonymous said...

    REsenble or resent? I'm really confused now!


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