Hoop crashed out at seven o'clock on Saturday night, leaving me to my boredom and a six pack of Bacardis. Before I drank, I tried to fight the monotony with origami. I'll admit, I had dreams of grandeur. Without having ever made so much as a paper fan, I was already visualizing the swans and tulips I was going to create. I was going to be a natural. Hoop was going to wake up in the morning to a house full of elegant paper art and exclaim that I was a genius.
After two hours, my excitement had waned, leaving me with a colorful pile of paper balls. Paper cups seemed to be the only thing I was capable of making. Although to be fair, I made a paper piano too, but it looked more like a bench than anything. It was as I was cleaning up the cups that I started to wonder if the things could actually hold water. Hey, if the end of the world ever comes, it might be nice to have someone in your party that can make a usable cup...
...or boat. In which case, I am NOT your chick. Sorry.
Any guesses what I filled my cup with? Bacardi. Then I thought, "Well, I shouldn't waste the rest of the bottle." I'm sure this is how all alcoholics begin, with origami cups. So I took my six pack into the computer room and I closed the door. It was around two in the morning that I started to wonder if I was drunk. The six pack was gone and I had filled my IPod with (*now questionable) music. I decided I would test my theory by blogging.
Unfortunately I forgot to post it, thus proving that I was probably pretty toasted. I opened my Blogger dashboard this morning, saw the post and thought, "Oh yeahhhhh. THAT'S what I did on Saturday night!" It was kind of fortunate too I guess. Not because I'm not going to give it to you, but because it really needed an introduction. So... Ta-dah. Here is your introduction. Now enjoy the stupid show:
I thik maybe I'm drunk. Just a little bit. Am still very witty though. I cracked myself up just a moment ago. Hey, I sound like Bridget Jones! Blah, blah, blah. I have a cute British accent. Blah, blah, blah. Can't talk in complete sentences. What the hell is up with that? I wanted to go through her diary with a red pen. If there is anyone who needs an editor for her own private thoughts, it's that broad. Although I probably need a sensor for mine. Someone to rate things before I say them. "Sorry, I can't let that one out. It's an 'R' and we're clearly in a 'PG13' environment. I'll just file that away until tonight. What about this? It involves puppies. Nice, safe, puppies. There you go." Wow. I am so self entertaining. I wonder what Hoop is dreaming about. Maybe I should go tickle his toes and find out? Peace out Homebloys.
*On a separate note, one of the songs I downloaded on Saturday night is titled, "Music is my hot, hot sex." I'm afraid to listen to it.
How was your weekend? Did you do anything fun?