I've come to the conclusion that you're bored.
So I've decided to throw down some helpful suggestions on how to spice things up, since I'm too sick to think about doing actual work today. I hear Britney Spears is pregnant again. That's impressive in itself. But how about fixing her with a whole litter this time? That way if she drops a few of the kids, the rest will still have a fighting chance. THAT would be a miracle.
Of course you might be more in the mood for a plague. In which case might I suggest Washington DC? The Footinmouthitis you gave to Bush is pretty ingenious, but I think we'd all be more impressed if you made his mouth fall off altogether. You could always make an appearance again. Although you might want to choose a better location next time. You can't just stroll into Disney World and expect everyone to take notice. You're lucky those kids didn't beat you up on their way to see Mickey.
How are the angels? Tell Bruce his toilet paper is a huge success down here. And Cindy's looking slim on that new Cream Cheese diet of hers. It doesn't look like she'll need that wing extension after all. I hope you have a great weekend. Good luck on that pool tournament with Satan tonight. Try not to scratch the Earth again. Do consider my suggestions if you get hung up for stuff to do. I'll see you around!
Random Site Of Interest: I can't decide if this site is brilliant or just disturbing. They give celebrities "facials." Which might be considered an improvement in some cases.
Courtesy of Odd Mix:
The words for this weekend are...
So get clicking!
Daily Hoop Conversation:
(Overheard phone conversation)
Hoop: So you're actually doing it huh? You're going into the military?
Hoop: Well, I wish you luck man. And whatever you do, don't tell them you're gay.
Hoop: Oh shit. I'm so sorry! I didn't know I was on speaker phone. I was just kidd- hello? Hello?
Things That Make You Go, "WTF?":
1. Never trust a bum with clean teeth.
2. I knew it was over when she picked up the kids in a Uhaul.
3. My instrument is my nose. I can blow and pick it too.
4. The most important supply during a hurricane is batteries... for my vibrator.
DOT: I will be updating the story on Monday, seeing as I'm really sick right now and not exactly in the best condition to take the lives of TT's characters in my hands. Unless you LIKE my most recent idea of pitting Tink against a giant fly swatter? ;)
Have A Fantastic Weekend!