Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Que sera, sera.

I was sitting around the house yesterday evening after Hoop dipped off to school, and suddenly got the idea that I would paint the concrete outside. So I hopped in my car and drove off to Home Depot. It wasn't until I parked that I realized...

I hadn't changed out of my PJs.

How does someone DO that? I sat there for a minute, deliberating whether to go in or go home. Since I wasn't exposing anything, I decided to just go in and be quick about it. I didn't even feel that embarrassed.

That is until one of the clerks jokingly asked me, "Are you sleep walking or awake?" That's it. I'm revoking Home Depot's "God" status.

Daily Hoop Conversation:
(In text messages)
Tink: I love you.
Hoop: I love you more.
Tink: That's not possible.
Hoop: Pfft. Whatever.
Tink: You stole my "pfft!"
Hoop: Mwahaha. It's mine now.
Tink: And you stole my "Mwahaha."
Hoop: So what if I did?
Tink: "I am the Queen Of Cheese!" Ha. Steal that.
Tink: You're not going to steal it, are you?
Hoop: No.
Tink: Damn. Foiled again.

What would Mr. Rogers do?
(On phone, outside)
Tink: You aren't going to believe this, but I can hear the neighbors having sex.
Friend: Yell at them to close the window.
Tink: You don't understand... They're OUTSIDE.
Friend: Can you see them?
Tink: Ew. No, Thank God.
Friend: Kinky little bastards.
Tink: So, what should I do?
Friend: Go inside.
Tink: I can't. They'll hear the door and then they'll know someone was listening!
Friend: Does it bother you if they know?
Tink: No. It bothers me if they know and don't care.
Friend: True.
Tink: I think they're done.
Friend: That was quick.
Friend: So, how do you think it was?
Tink: Oh my God.

Today's Spam Mail:
Pseudonym savvy from Isabella Hutchinson
Veterinarian Malfunction from Joe Stinson
Townhouse Gentry from Jess Boggs

Hoop Quote Of The Day:
I dare you to go into that instrument store and ask for strings for your air guitar.

June Search Terms:
(What people put into search engines that bring them here)
1. With my glasses R=T I rhink you need yout eyes te-checked.
2. The difference between an engagement ring and a wedding ring?
A black eye if you get it wrong.
3. Keeps grabbing boobs Sounds like a personal problem.
4. My boobless boobs
I'm going to let that little oxymoron slide and invite you into my Itty Bitty Titty Committee.
5. Everyone loves a colon scrape Right above a spinal tap.


At 20 June, 2006, Blogger Jay said...

I've seen many women wandering around Wal-Mart in their PJ's, so actually you're being trendy. Well, white-trash trendy, but what the hell.

"strings for your air guitar" now that's funny

"Everyone loves a colon scrape" Well not EVERYone ... latests statistics show around 10% are into that.

At 20 June, 2006, Anonymous OddMix said...

Now, see. I would have revoked thier status if he hadn't given you a hard time.

At 20 June, 2006, Blogger Chelle Y. said...

You ought to send that conversation with the Home Depot Clerk to Reader's Digest's ("All in a Day's Work...") That is too funny.

What else is funny is all your conversations with Hoop. What I'd give to be a fly on your wall (Ha).

I hope you guys that continue being like that throughout your lives together.

At 20 June, 2006, Blogger Chris said...

Next time take a teddy bear with you to the store? ;)

At 20 June, 2006, Blogger Mignon said...

I'm guessing the neighbors aren't hot?

"Mwahaha" is a total blogger quote. Tell Hoop to get his own site and quit stealing your funny.

At 20 June, 2006, Anonymous mrspao said...

Maybe Home Depot should start handing out free cocoa just for you :)

Were you wearing slippers too?

At 20 June, 2006, Anonymous mamatulip said...

Everybody loves a colon scrape?! OMG, I don't know what's funnier -- that or your response. *snort*

Dude, I go out in my pj's on purpose. Don't feel bad. ;)

At 20 June, 2006, Blogger Arabella said...

I go out in my PJ's on purpose, too. I don't get many stranger looks than usual.

My word verification ends in "bj."

And I failed it.


At 20 June, 2006, Blogger DebbieDoesLife said...

Hey, we went to a really nice Hunan restaurant on Father's Day and a teen girl came in wearing what looked like her pajamas. I would say at Home Depot you were overdressed.

I can't believe you didn't try and watch that couple.

I have always said that Hoop is a fuckin' genius.

Go back to my blog and try to figure out where I am going. I can't believe no one has figured it out. Geez.

At 20 June, 2006, Blogger Newt said...

Ha Ha Ha, I can't tell you how many times I go to the store or head for work in my slippers. And unless they are from victoria's secret I doubt your pj's look any more out of place than current fashion these days. Then again, since slips are all the fashion right now as a top then I guess even something from VS wouldn't be all that odd. Plus your cute as hell so I'm guessing you would only get better service at Home Depot in your jammies.

And I love the string guitar comment. LOL

At 20 June, 2006, Blogger Rude Cactus said...

You smoked a cigarette after you hung up the phone didn't you?

At 20 June, 2006, Blogger Foo said...

Don't let Turtle find out you went out in your jammies. She will chastise you most ferociously.

The Mr. Rogers conversation is a real keeper. Like something the writers for Friends might have come up with.

At 21 June, 2006, Blogger F&W said...

Okay, I know we have the same name so I may be a little biased, but I think Chelle has a great idea. Reader's Digest pays, like, $250 for each little blurb. You could make a mint!

At 21 June, 2006, Blogger Freakazojd said...

Oh my God, does the comedic genius never end?! You guys are awesome. LOVE the "air guitar dare," henceforth to be known as "thairtardare." Rock on, kids.

At 21 June, 2006, Blogger R. Robyn said...

I can't believe you went out in your pajamas without noticing....Wait, I can't believe someone at Home Depot actually said something. THEY'RE the ones working at Home Depot. Not that that's a BAD thing.....

At 21 June, 2006, Blogger Cheryl said...

Tink...totally white trash gf! I can't believe you did it. Sorry, but you're losing idol status in my book.

I agree with Foo on the sex incident. Sounds like something from "Friends."

Here's a true story...
My gf and her future husband were in the woods doing it. And just by accident happened to land in a patch of poison ivy. Kinda put a damper on things for a bit. *snicker*

At 21 June, 2006, Blogger EE said...

"I dare you to go into that instrument store and ask for strings for your air guitar"


And sheesh, you sure do get a lot of boob searchs, lol. Course not near as many as mine for 'ee boobs'....ROFL!

At 21 June, 2006, Blogger Heather said...

Your neighbors were having sex OUTSIDE?? Eww!!


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