Monday, March 26, 2007

WWHD

Seen spray painted on the side of a car today:

"What would Homer do?"

Survey says...

(Is it wrong to envy a cartoon?)

Weekend Recap:
1. Friday night the boys and I decided to stay local and drink.
2. Our first stop was at a sports bar. The first thing we noticed on entering was that the guys out numbered the girls ten to one.
3. Once we sat down, Hoop turned to me and asked, "Do you think this is a gay bar?"
4. "A gay SPORTS bar? Isn't that an oxymoron?"
5. No hate mail please. I am NOT bashing homosexuals. In fact... Hoop is a lesbian. Seriously. He digs chicks. A LOT.
6. After one beer we went to another bar, a little dive with a $2 cover charge.
7. "Don't do it!" The girl outside mouthed to me. I had a sudden daydream of the partiers inside being forced to dance at gun point. Which would explain the seizure-like dance moves.
8. Fortunately, I didn't have to wonder about it much further. My cheap thrifty boyfriend thought $2 was too much to spend. So we went elsewhere.
9. The end of the night found us at the "Calm Fungus." Those of you on the south east side of the U.S. might know what restaurant I'm referring to. For those who don't, it's a hippy pizza place with a great atmosphere.
10. From the moment we sat down at the bar I noticed a 40-something year old gentleman eyeing me from across the way. But he wasn't staring at me persay, more like my hand. "That's a beautiful ring," he finally said. "Why do you wear it on that finger?"
11. So I explained that the ring is a family heirloom (not an engagement ring), three generations old, and hand carved. He marveled at it for a moment before I thought to pull my hand away.
12. It shows what kind of world we live in when you're afraid that someone might like what you have too much. Luckily, I have a plan for such a situation.
13. If someone ever tries to steal my ring...
14. ...I'm going to eat it.
15. That puts a new spin on my (and your son's) catch phrase huh,
Butterfly Girl?
16. Saturday morning the satellite guy girl arrived. Lemme tell you, this chick was so cool I momentarily wanted to BE her.
17. Then I remembered my fear of heights and instantly reconsidered.
18. After she left, Hoop and I laid around for an hour admiring the nature channel in high definition. It was like having the Rain Forrest in our living room.
19. Only, less wet and without the hand-sized bugs. *Shudder*
20. Saturday afternoon the boys and I accompanied their Mom to see
"Premonition" with Sandra Bullock in it.
21. Wow, that movie poster is kind of freaky. The movie on the other hand, was not. *Yawn*
22. That night we attempted to go out drinking again. Hoop and I, not the most frequent partiers, found we were completely burned out. Nash pushed and prodded, but by midnight we were spent.
23. Sunday afternoon we went out shooting. The targets of choice were paint cans, beer bottles, an old scanner, a broken VCR... and a mostly empty propane tank.
24. You cringed didn't you?
25. Don't worry. I still have my eyebrows. It made a lovely little show though. Next time we might try a fuller one.
26. After a fairly successful round of shooting we were interrupted by a guy on a passing four-wheeler.
Four-wheeler: Whatcha shooting?
Hoop: Cans.
Nash: *Snort*
Tink: I think he means your GUN you dope.
27. I don't know about you, but I'm ready for it to be the weekend again. Happy Monday folks.

Tomorrow: Pictures for the WWC!

Labels:

22 Comments:

At 26 March, 2007, Blogger spellconjurer said...

Oh Tinkilicious,,,,,I love shooting too. Our family has a cabin in the wilderness of the Upper Pennisula of Michigan. There is no electricity, a manual water pump outside, and a double outhouse. His and hers side. Hers is decorated with sexy guy posters, and his side is decorated with a chalk outline of my sisters bestfriend, complete with her undergarments stapled in the proper places. Anyhowwwwwwww (a mini-novel as you refer to them) I like to shoot the outhouse with a BB gun when people are in it. The bb's never go through the wall, but it's the proper place to scare the _______ out of someone. GIDDIAP for gas lights in the woods!!!!!

 
At 26 March, 2007, Blogger Jay said...

Hey! How'd you get that picture of me sleeping?

Eat the ring? Brilliant plan! Just wash it down with some beer. LOL

The nature channel in HD would be cool. Do you have a Bose surround sound? You could get some tall plant and a mister along with the surround sound and it REALLY would be a rain forrest.

 
At 26 March, 2007, Anonymous susan said...

Funny...I saw a bumper sticker this morning that said "What would Ozzy do?" I don't even want to think about that one.

Cans! That is SO something I would say.

 
At 26 March, 2007, Blogger Newt said...

Yep, I gotta admit. "Cans" would have been my answer too. I missed the new Homer show on Sunday cause we were at 300. I feel like my week is not complete. sigh......

 
At 26 March, 2007, Blogger fiwa said...

The ring idea is brilliance at work! I can't wait to tell my husband that - it's always been his biggest excuse for not getting me a diamond, that someone might steal it. :) :)

I know what you mean about the HD nature channel, it's crystal clear on that station, isn't it? Almost too clear - specially if the person on screen has bad skin. You see every tiny little flaw.

 
At 26 March, 2007, Blogger mamatulip said...

I'd love to see a picture of that ring.

 
At 26 March, 2007, Blogger Kim: The Mom, The Myth said...

Must...see...ring. Photo, please.

 
At 26 March, 2007, Blogger butterfly girl said...

Grandma: *cooing*Did your mummy get your hair cut? You look so cute!
Son:I ate it.
Grandma: *looking sideways at mom*
Mom: What?

Happened this weekend. Grandma was not amused. I think it's funny as hell!

The ring sounds wonderful. You should keep it in a wall safe like rich people.

 
At 26 March, 2007, Blogger Gracey said...

Definitely eat the ring, but then they may kidnap you and wait till you poop it out! That's not a pretty thought either! LOL

 
At 26 March, 2007, Blogger Chris said...

So when you shoot a propane tank, does it explode? Or ???

 
At 26 March, 2007, Blogger Maggie said...

On the gender front, the satellite people redeemed themselves a little with the representative 'cool chick'?

Eating the ring, I'm noting that in the back of my head. Only draw back to that would be the requisite poop checking...

 
At 26 March, 2007, Blogger Kell said...

That would be one way to save the ring. Great idea! Those multi-vitamins are bigger than a ring and we can get those down. A ring would be so easy. At least going down.

I would've said cans, too.

 
At 26 March, 2007, Anonymous BP said...

I had no idea that Florida still retained areas rural enough where one could do some impromptu target practice without the local Federales making an appearance. Doing something like that around here would probably result in SWAT joining you for an unwelcome cameo on the six o'clock news.You must be deep in the boonies.

 
At 27 March, 2007, Blogger Tawcan said...

Sounds like an action packed weekend. Must see pics!

$2 cover for a bar? It better be a damn good bar to charge cover!

 
At 27 March, 2007, Blogger Dirk_Star said...

Ithinkj something is wrong with my eyes.

Can you fly over for a look?

 
At 27 March, 2007, Blogger Mike Y said...

So... Hoop's a lesbian, huh? LOL!

I was considering seeing Premonition, but it did look a bit weak. Thanks for saving me the money and time. :)

 
At 27 March, 2007, Blogger Sunshine said...

My hubby is a lesbian too. And contends if he was a chick he'd be a lesbian...like this is strange or shocking. Wow, way to be outside the dots there, honey.

 
At 27 March, 2007, Blogger Chris said...

Maybe it's a term - gay sports. Like, it's a bar for people who play competitive badminton and curling.

(No offense to you professional badminton players and curlers out there).

 
At 27 March, 2007, Anonymous OddMix said...

I wanna go shoot a propane cylinder with you and Hoop! At least take a picture next time, K?

 
At 27 March, 2007, Blogger Tink said...

SC: I love your description of the outhouses! You need to take pictures the next time you're there. Try to aim away from the seat though. ;)

Jay: Hoop just installed Bose speakers on Sunday. Of course... We haven't quite figured out how to wire them yet, so it might be awhile before we actually get to enjoy them.

Fiwa: Glad I could help! Don't forget to report back if it works. Inquiring female minds would like to know.

Chris: It shot up in the air like a rocket and when it came back down it was completely frosted over.

BP: Where we go shooting is behind a county dump. I'm sure the cops know what we're doing, they just don't care. It would be another thing if we were around houses, or causing a ruckus. Which might be the case if we get that full tank for next time. Hehe

Oddmix: For you? Anything. :)

 
At 28 March, 2007, Blogger EE said...

I wondered about that movie....good to know.

Happy Monday (er, uh, Tuesday now I guess, lol) Chickadee!

 
At 28 March, 2007, Blogger graymama said...

I am having visions of the scene in Office Space with the printer. Destroying stuff can be quite therapeutic :-)

 

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