Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Mixed Nuts

Progress Report: $10.50 saved. 49.5 cigarettes not smoked. My tongue is a little burned out from all the mints, but the cravings are still manageable. Although I'm finding it a little tougher today to convince myself that I'm a nonsmoker and not just a smoker who's not smoking. Mom's doing about as well as I am, although Hoop relapsed a bit and smoked seven yesterday. He's aiming to half that today. Have I mentioned how much this sucks?

Would You Rather?
1. Have your cell phone ring function set on "Airhorn" or "Taser?" Airhorn
2. Laugh only at inappropriate times (funerals etc) or have a color changing nose that declares what mood you're in? Color changing nose
3. Watch a porno with your parents or starring them? With
4. Always hear the thoughts of everyone around you or have everyone around you always hear your thoughts? Always hear my thoughts
5. Have the ability to fly or live for 200 years? Fly
Now you.

What Big Teeth You Have: Last night Hoop made me watch
Ravenous, a movie about cannibalism. He chose to pop it in at dinner, assuring me that all the gory stuff came later. I should have known better. I had just taken a bite of chicken when suddenly the screen was filled with bleeding heads and images of people tearing into bloody slabs of beef. I sat transfixed, the unchewed chicken like a stone in my mouth. Hoop quickly lunged for the remote. "Uh... Maybe we should put this in after dinner?"

Daily Hoop Conversation:
Hoop: What did you think of the movie?
Tink: Really gross. I'll never look at steak the same again.
Hoop: But you liked it didn't you?
Tink: Yeah, it was pretty good.
Hoop: So... You want to go next door and eat the neighbors?


At 21 February, 2006, Blogger Arabella said...

1. Airhorn;
2. Inappropriate laughter;
3. With;
4. Always hear thoughts of everyone around me;
5. 200 years.

Glad to hear you're doing ok.

At 21 February, 2006, Anonymous TB said...

Hang in there Tink, I swear to you it gets easier after the nicotene clears out of your system. Also, make sure you're drinking a ton of water to detox.

Okay... Is the phone set to actually taser someone when it rings? Because that would be cool.

And I would choose to live 200 years, but only if the aging process slowed waaayyyy down.

At 21 February, 2006, Blogger Chris said...

Now I'm glad I don't live anywhere near you! Have you ever watched "Delicatessen"?!

Hang in there!

1. Time to turn the ringer off.
2. Well, since I already laugh at inappropriate times...
3. With (ack!! - I'm still trying to recover from discovering the "increase your sexual pleasure videos" at my dad & stepmom's house last Christmas)
4. Thoughts of everyone else
5. Live for 200 years... if, as TB said, the ageing process slowed down A LOT.

At 21 February, 2006, Blogger V said...

1. Airhorn
2. Laugh only at inappropriate times - already have it, night as well stick with it.
3. Watch porno WITH parents. (With two ministers...THAT wouldactually be pretty funny!)
4. Always hear my thoughts
5. Fly (Why would I want to live 200 years if I couldn't fly?)

You're doing good! I think day 3 is the bitch. I like to refer to it as my road rage day. And you're past that one, yes?

At 21 February, 2006, Blogger Jess Riley said...

1. Polka
2. have a color-changing laugh
3. oh boy. how about just borrow a porno from my parents' library?
4. Hear the thoughts of the freaks around me, because then I'd never run out of stuff to write about
5. Fly, dude. Totally fly.

At 21 February, 2006, Blogger Mary said...

1. airhorn "oh, is that me ringing again??"
2. the laughing. I just remember that grey's anatomy episode when the chick blushed ALL THE TIME. That would suck
3. With. My parents don't have sex, remember?
4. Everyone else's thoughts

Hang in there Tink, you be kickin ass in the smokin' department!

At 21 February, 2006, Blogger Mignon said...

Does stuff smell better yet? That's something to look forward to, although Hoop might get to stinkin' if he doesn't cut back a little...

At 21 February, 2006, Anonymous gb said...

1. Airhorn
2. color changing nose
3. Watch with...Ewww!!
4. Hear everyone else's
5. Fly-now that would be cool!

At 21 February, 2006, Blogger mama_tulip said...

Have you seen the movie Parents? That's a fucked up movie about people eating people.

Hang in there, Tink! You're doing great. :)

At 21 February, 2006, Anonymous Amanda B. said...

Hang in there Kiddo. You can do it!

At 21 February, 2006, Blogger Emily said...

1. Airhorn, definatly

2. I already laugh inappropriatly...so I chose not to change

3. oh God....with...I guess....

4. hear the thoughts of others...I'd hate people to know how bitchy I can be(Eww...but not if I was hearing the thoughts of my parents as they watched that porno with me!)

5. Fly

Keep up the good work!!! Get through one week and you are home free!!

At 21 February, 2006, Blogger Tink said...

Arabella: And what would you DO for 200 years?

TB: I'm assuming it would taser whoever is wearing it. Which would condition me to hate the phone more than I already do. I'm sure the aging process would have to slow down. Otherwise you'd be having "Death Becomes Her" moments... Losing limbs. Bleh.

Chris: "Delicatessen?" Nope, but if it has blood and guts in it I'm sure Hoop will hunt it down. :)

V: TWO Ministers? Oh man. That would be kinky. LOL I mean gross. Definitely gross.

Jess: A color changing laugh would be amazing. That sounds like something out of Harry Potter.

Mary: Thanks for the encouragement. I'm at half a cigarette a day. I mean honestly, what the hell is that DOING for me? It's a mind thing. I'll be over it by this weekend. They don't even taste good anymore.

Mignon: Not really. I keep waiting for the perks. Right now all I have is this persistent nasty taste in my mouth which I think is my body purging all the crap out. I do feel better when I get up in the morning. No heavy chest feeling.

GB: You can help be build a "Flying School."

Mama T: "Parents?" I haven't seen or heard of that one either. Hoop is going to freak when he hears about all these. IF he hears about these. Muwahahaha

Amanda B: Thank you. God I hope so. I feel so moody and restless!

At 21 February, 2006, Blogger Tink said...

Emily: Ooops, missed ya. Ew, I never thought of that mind reading thing with the porno. That's the stuff of nightmares right there.

At 21 February, 2006, Blogger Jay said...

1. Airhorn, If I had it set to taser I would hate for it to ring when in my front pocket .. OUCH!
2. Inapporpriate laughter... I'm already an expert at that
3. This question just freaks me the hell out. I would rather be hung up by thumbs than do either.
4. Other's thought, I get into enough trouble without people knowing what I'm thinking. Besides, it would help in a poker game.
5. Fly No need for a car anymore.

Keeping track of the money saved is a good way to keep motivated. Put the that money towards a vacation or new iPod or something cool.

At 21 February, 2006, Blogger Arabella said...

Tink--I'd spend 200 years "balling," or else "sculpting my body with balls and bands," though probably in a way different from what Denise Austin intended.


At 21 February, 2006, Blogger EE said...

Awww Tink, hang in there...

LMAO at Hoop..."So... You want to go next door and eat the neighbors?"

1. Airhorn...although I'd pretty much want to ditch the thing!

2. color changing nose

3. With?

4. Oh, ALWAYS hear everyone elses thoughts

5. Fly


At 21 February, 2006, Blogger The Gradual Gardener said...

1. Taser *twitch*
2. Inappropriate times *twitch*
3. I'd rather burn the TV.
4. Hear the thoughts of others.
5. Given the current condition of social security, I'm going to have to go with flying. How on earth would I support myself for 200 years?

At 21 February, 2006, Blogger Odd Mix said...

You are too funny, Tink. I think I will take the fifth on this meme - thanks just the same.

I am sorry you are having a rough time, but I am very glad you are doing it. I want to read Hoop conversations for years to come. Keep it up - we are pulling for you.

At 22 February, 2006, Blogger Alien said...

Yay Tink! I'm so proud of you! Rock on with your bad self, sister! (And make sure to consistently remind Hoop that you're "winning". Ya know... if you're keeping score and all...)

At 22 February, 2006, Blogger R. Robyn said...

I'm proud of your non-smoking ways! It'll be a week or two until you don't crave the cigarette, and you'll adapt new habits that replace smoking. But in about a month and a half you might be chewing your fingers off or eating everything in sight because your cravings came back....(oh wait, that's just me)

At 22 February, 2006, Blogger wordgirl said...

1. airhorn

At 22 February, 2006, Blogger wordgirl said...

1. airhorn
2. inappropriate laughter
3. yuck...I pass
4. hear everyone else's thoughts
5. fly

Good on you for trying to quit.

At 26 February, 2006, Blogger Ditsy Chick said...

If the neighbors are a little on the aged side, be sure and take the tenderizer. Can you please come eat my upstairs neighbor's dog, while you are at it?


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