Monday, February 19, 2007

Save Our Souls

Weekend Recap:
1. I came to the conclusion this weekend that Hoop and I have NO IDEA what we're doing.
2. Saturday morning we drove to our house to assess the situation.
3. In which we decided...
4. ...we needed beer. Lots and lots of beer.
5. After that was taken care of, along with toilet paper, cleaning supplies, and air fresheners, (What can I say? The house stunk.) we formulated a plan on what to do next.
6. The problem was, we each had a separate plan.
7. Hoop's plan was to scrape off the existing paint.
8. Mine was to start taping off the rooms.
9. Neither panned out quite as expected.
10. It took me 45 minutes to realize the tape I was using wasn't faulty, the baseboards were dusty.
11. Hoop continued to peel the high-gloss-industrial-plastic-textured paint off until he hit the drywall.
12. I was good. I held my tongue. But for the record? I TOLD HIM SO.
13. Who the hell paints their house with this stuff anyway? It looks like the paint they use on hospitals, auto shops, and the banisters of Disney World to cover up dirt.
14. Although it DID come in handy when we found a snot spot on the wall where the ceiling guy had sneezed. It wiped right off!
15. The difference between Hoop and I can be summed up in what happened next.
16. We needed advice on paint:
17. I wanted to ask someone at Home Depot.
18. Hoop settled for the opinion of an elderly gentleman at Walmart who barely spoke English.
19. We weighed the idea of hiring a professional painter:
20. I pulled out the phone book.
21. Hoop pulled into a new construction neighborhood and asked a group of Mexicans if they wanted to earn a little extra cash.
22. In the end we declared, "To hell with it! We'll do this ourselves and see how it turns out."
23. And then nothing happened. We'd wasted so much time arguing, taping, spackling, and cleaning, we didn't have enough time to PAINT.
24. On top of that, neither Walmart nor Target carry fans right now because they're a "seasonal item." So we're either going to live in a bat cave for two more months or bite the bullet and pay Home Depot's high prices.
25. At least we have our paint colors picked out:
Tink: What color should we paint our bedroom?
Hoop: Red with yellow flames!

Courtesy of
Odd Mix

View (From Our Backyard)


...this large gaping hole where paint should be.

(Some Random Weekend Pictures)

Something Old

I wonder how old the baby is now?

Something Blue

And white, gray, brown, and black. Oy. Pick a color scheme!

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At 19 February, 2007, Blogger Peggy said...

It looks as though the big traffic areas are tiled. Good for easy cleaning.

We've always painted our own houses. The Man of the Place is very fussy and gets very annoyed if painters don't do straight edges or take the switch plates off. Its easier to let him get on with it. Cheaper too.

Good luck!

At 19 February, 2007, Anonymous wordgirl said...

That wallpaper border has been up awhile. Looks like it's from the 80's. And that tile has got to go.

At 19 February, 2007, Blogger Tink said...

Peggy: Is he free next weekend? :)

Wordgirl: The whole damn place is outdated. I don't know which end of the house to start on first.

At 19 February, 2007, Blogger Alex said...

When I first moved to Hawaii last September, it was hotter than blazes and after about three weeks, I decided that the two fans I had in my bedroom were not cutting it (no, no ac in the house.) Imagine my dismay when THREE SEPERATE STORES told me that fans were seasonal and no longer in stock. This is HAWAII! Its ridiculously hot here ALL YEAR LONG. The logic, it eludes me. I was flabbergasted, and then practically cried tears of relief when I found one dusty fan box in the back corner of a shelf at WalMart, of all places.

(mutter mutter)...seasonal item my ass...(mutter mutter)

At 19 February, 2007, Blogger mamatulip said...

You mean you don't like that beautiful tile?!

At 19 February, 2007, Blogger Tink said...

Alex: Right?! I looked at the Walmart dude and said, "But... It's Florida." He shrugged and I repeated, "But... It's FLORIDA."

Mama T: Actually, I love the tile. I hate the black grout and the fact that the damn things are all uneven. The Master Bath has rocks substituting tile all along the shower. From what we've gathered, they did most of the home improvements themselves and didn't have a tile cutter. So they grouted in river rocks instead.

At 19 February, 2007, Blogger Jay said...

Painting isn't that bad if you have the patience to clean the walls and basebaords and to all the taping. My sister is very good at that.

Do the Master Bedroom first. You can live in that room while doing the other rooms.

And I love the red with yellow flames on the walls of the master bedroom. That's brilliant.

At 19 February, 2007, Blogger fiwa said...

Oh girl. I hate painting with a frickin' passion. Hate it. You have my deepest sympathy, really you do. Drink lots of beer and just keep telling yourself that sooooon this will all be nuthin' but a bad memory.

River rock in the bathroom? You have to share some pictures of that. It actually sounds kinda cool.

At 19 February, 2007, Blogger Tink said...

Jay: My problem is, I have tilted-head syndrome. You know, where I make everything crooked because apparently I don't keep my head straight. I'm afraid I'm going to have wobbly lines all over the place, even with the tape! :)

Fiwa: It could have been cool. But it's not. They superglued the leftover rocks to the bottom of the cabinets. What the hell was I thinking buying a project house?

At 19 February, 2007, Blogger meno said...

Welcome to the fun and joy of home ownership.

Maybe just sneak over and burn it down and claim the insurance $.
No? Bad idea? You may change your mind.

At 19 February, 2007, Blogger Foo said...

I'd say the reason for the industrial teflon paint is probably the same as the reason for the wallpaper border with the lions and giraffes and elfalinks.

I love the smell of spackle in the morning...

The whole thing is overwhelming, I know. Just take my lovely bride's advice and take it a bit at a time.

At 19 February, 2007, Blogger Ellie said...

I fully understand what you're going through. My house needed a huge face lift, the house hadn't been painted in about 8 yrs. But in the end it all worked out and now I love my house. I tried painting it myself and in fact Newt helped, but in the end I had a professional come in and redo it, it was just taking too long and finally I quit. My recommendation is have a painting party, buy some party subs and beer, painting goes a lot faster when you have friends to talk and laugh with while getting the job done.
Good Luck,

At 19 February, 2007, Anonymous Anonymous said...

It gets easier as you go. You get a groove and a feel and hopefully learn how to work together. This is my "thing" if I lived closer I would help you out. "Life will be great once your done watching the paint dry"

At 19 February, 2007, Anonymous TB said...

I love to paint. I'd come and help if I was allowed.
I can't believe you can't find fans right now. Even if they ARE seasonal, this is Florida for god's sake.
Keep your eyes on the big picture. It may take awhile, but you'll get there and it will be so satisfying to look back on the before pic's.

And your backyard is huge! I see many great barbecues there.

At 19 February, 2007, Blogger Kell said...

The prep time for painting is a pain, but it's so worth it. And once you get painting you'll be so happy with how much better it looks. It's worth it!

And a painting party is a good idea. My brother and friend helped me paint and it was a lot more fun that way. Especially since it always takes 2 coats.

At 19 February, 2007, Blogger flutter said...

Ok, I don't really know why but your question about how old the baby is now made me teary! Oy, hormones, I do declare.

At 19 February, 2007, Blogger Newt said...

Love the pictures. I'll join the painting party!

At 20 February, 2007, Anonymous Patsy said...

Painting party sounds great, but beer no way, we had a party once while hubby was suppose to hook up hot and cold water in basement in a house that we bought, only thing got the water hooked up wrong, had hot where cold was suppose to be, had to redo it next week. The key is take it slow and careful. And have fun.

At 20 February, 2007, Blogger Peggy said...

You can re-grout you know if you don't like black grout. It is a lot less expensive than re-tiling. Who uses black grout????

At 20 February, 2007, Blogger Samantha said...

I'm sending you lots of hugs! The house we are moving out of was a bit like that. I agree the black grout is awful - is that carpet next to it?

I'm a bit of butterfly when doing anything like that. I start something and get easily distracted and try and start something else. I would say try and do the master bedroom first so you have somewhere to sleep that doesn't belong to Big Bit!

At 20 February, 2007, Blogger acaligurl said...

ah these will be the times you remember.

At 20 February, 2007, Blogger Sunshine said...

I didn't read all the comments, but did anyone else notice that the "big gaping hole" looks like the outline of a camel's head and neck??? Anyone??? OK, yeah, I used to see the shape of puppies and umbrellas in the clouds as a kid too. I know, I'm a freak.

At 20 February, 2007, Blogger Pamer said...

The place looks great and I'm sure it will be the toast of Architectural Digest in no time.

At 21 February, 2007, Blogger EE said...


God Tink, at what point does the fun start for you?! It shouldn't be this hard or stressful. (((you)))

Love the pictures as always. *smooches* girlie


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