Wednesday, April 29, 2009


Daily Etsy Picks:
Robot Love Vinyl Messenger Bag
Unemployed Magnet
Vintage Roulette Set
Wishing Tree Sculpture (Only $20!)

WTF Etsy?:
Bacon Soap (Because nothing gets you clean like grease.)
Mr. T Tampon Case
Real Moose Poop Earrings
Dead Animal Face On A Vase (Oh-kay.)


Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Weekly Words Challenge 82!

The words for this week were R and Angry.

How did you interpret them?

R for Rat Terrier

R for Refuse

R for Roses

(Angry) Mad Housewife Wine

(Car Show)

(Other Random Photos)

Baby King Snake

If you haven't joined the fun yet, go
here for details. We also have a Flickr group for easy shareability. Not only do you get to add "Lowly Foon" to your resume, but you get to find out the new words at least an hour earlier. Happy snapping!

The words for next week are:
Bokeh (Definition

Tomorrow: I Heart Etsy!


Monday, April 27, 2009

I Don't See Dead People

I had an interview on Friday at a funeral home.

It dawned on me as I was waiting for my interviewer that they probably don't decorate for the holidays at funeral homes. Definitely not Halloween. Bummer. Somewhere from the back a man emerged, tall and droopy like an old sunflower. He asked me for my papers without meeting my eyes and then we stood side by side for a couple of minutes awkwardly. It gave me time to stare at the three paisley couches in the room. Paisley. Good God, why?

I was rescued soon after by an older Italian man with the same first name as my Father. He entertained me for the next thirty minutes while I waited for the boss. "Are you married?" He asked. "Since November." "Bless you." He explained that the first gentlemen I'd met was the funeral director, Vance. Apparently, no one liked Vance because he was annoying. He was also the person I would be working with. Great. "Does this place creep you out?" "Maybe a little." I replied, staring at the couches.

I can't remember the name of the man who interviewed me. I think I might have been distracted by the urns that filled the room we were sitting in. He explained that the job was not for an administrative assistant position, as had been posted. It was for an office manager and substitute funeral director. On occasion I might have to wheel around bodies. I might even have to touch them. "But we'd never make you embalm them." As if that were an option!

I would be in charge of accounting and sales and funeral arrangements, a real one-woman-show. "Where will the funeral director be?" I asked. "Out selling, mostly. He visits all the retirement communities." For some odd reason, that disturbed me the most. Fortunately, the pay was lower than I was willing to accept. I say fortunately because I might have taken the job otherwise, out of obligation. But it didn't make me feel good. Despite the awesome blog fodder it might have created.

I knew when I left that they were going to offer me the position. "You can't work at a funeral home!" My Mom cried over the phone on my way home. "How will you ever make friends?!" Thanks Ma. "How'd it go?" Hoop asked when I walked in the door. "Did you knock them dead? I bet you killed them." They called this morning. They wanted me to start immediately. "It's not the direction I want to take my career," I told the woman politely.

Because I don't see dead people.

Not even professionally.

Labels: ,

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

I Heart Etsy Returns

But first-

The naked lady statue in yesterday's post was taken in front of the Library of Congress. Believe it or not, they're not prudes there! Although they did snub us when we tried to push our way into the actual library. Apparently, you have to be a resident of DC... and have a list of research topics... and not announce that you're trying to sneak into the library.

Oh, and I have no idea what kind of cow-like-thing that is. Really, guys? You thought me, the chick from FLORIDA, would have knowledge of livestock? How about we call it the Would-probably-taste-good-on-my-plate variety.

Daily Etsy Picks:
"Sassy Sea Urchin No.2" Print
Ceramic Nest Egg
Custom Recycled Wood Sign (My word would be "spork".)
Dark Purple Jalapeno Pepper (Seeds) Cool!

WTF Etsy?:
Headless Deer Plushie
Wise Fools Inspirational Inspiracy Text Messaging Service (What?)
Antique German Doll Arm (Where the hell is the rest of it?)
Primitive Muslin Bunny (She meant to say it was evil.)


Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Weekly Words Challenge 81!

The words for this week were Home and Door. Many thanks to Jay for hosting in my absence last week! Have patience with me today. I have a lot of catching up to do and a four hour meeting with Worksource this afternoon. But I'll be by as soon as possible!

How did you interpret them?

George Washington's Home

Awesome Doorway


(Washington DC: Obligatory Tourist Photos)

(Washington DC: Wish Tree)

"I wish everyone would realize that we're all in this together."

"I wish for an endless supply of mustard."

(Washington DC: Other)


Ceiling (Library of Congress)

Vietnam Veteran Memorial

Korean War Memorial

Smithsonian Mural


Cherry Blossoms

Coat Statue

If you haven't joined the fun yet, go
here for details. We also have a Flickr group for easy shareability. Not only do you get to add "Lowly Foon" to your resume, but you get to find out the new words at least an hour earlier. Happy snapping!

The words for next week are:

Tomorrow: I Heart Etsy

Labels: ,

Monday, April 20, 2009

Things I Learned On My Spring Break

1. You know there's something wrong with you when you annoy a five year old.
2. Never ask a senile person to keep a secret. They wont.
3. Hiding a joke Easter egg with the word "Sucker" written in it isn't very funny if the person who finds it is too young to read.
4. Don't go to Washington D.C. with someone who is of the opposite political party than you. Unless you like to argue.
5. Riding in subway cars is fun until someone pukes.
6. Just because a museum is free, doesn't mean the food there won't cost you a small fortune.
7. A $6 cookie does not taste like gold or rainbows or better than a $2 one.
8. It's always great to be home... unless you forgot to take the trash out before you left.

More soon!

So, what did I miss in your world?


Thursday, April 09, 2009

My Beer Is Bad

So don't drink it while I'm gone, OK? I'm serious. It could make you drunk.

Pickled Beef will be closed from Thursday the 9th through Thursday the 16th. We're headed to Tennessee (again) for Easter and then to Washington D.C. directly after. Unlike *Kutner, I have no plans to fake my own suicide. I'm just going there for a vacation. Although I'll be honest, if we tour the White House, I'm going to wear my good underwear. The wonderful and awesomest Jay of Cynical Bastard has agreed to host the WWC in my stead. So go check out his blog next Tuesday. As if you weren't going over there already. Pfft.

*Coming out next fall, "Harold and Kumar go to White House."

While I'm away, please refrain from dressing the dogs in drag or prank calling various ex-somethingorothers with our landline. The last time you did that, we got egged twelve times. Ok, that was a lie. It was once, with one egg and they totally missed the house. True story! For a moment, Hoop thought a bird had dropped it. If you don't hear from me again, the Langoliers got us. Feel free to ransack the blog for valuables. Have a great week Homebloys! I'll see you on the flipside.


Wednesday, April 08, 2009

Better Delayed Than Delayed-er

Daily Etsy Picks:
Jizo Set (Awesome!)
Sahara 1922 Necklace
Amazing Wine Bottle Holder
Foxy Loxy Locket

WTF Etsy?:
Slime Face T-shirt
Hanging Gilded Vagina Lightcatcher (WOW.)
Mushroom Cap Floppy Hat (In formal black!)

You Heart Etsy:
Little My in Red Violet (Thank you Niki for finding this!)


Tuesday, April 07, 2009

Weekly Words Challenge 79!

The words for this week were Opening and Spring.

How did you interpret them?


A baby lemon!

Although these might seem to be from the archives, I assure you they're new. It's really pathetic that it took me this long to download 2008's Christmas photos.

Grandma was so excited to open her stocking.

This was my gag gift to Big Bit. I'm sure I'll be seeing those again this year.

(Other Random Photos)

Our Office

Hoop's Office IN Our Office

If you haven't joined the fun yet, go
here for details. We also have a Flickr group for easy shareability. Not only do you get to add *"Lowly Foon" to your resume, but you get to find out the new words at least an hour earlier. Happy snapping!

*Slang for Spork.

The words for next week are:
Favorite Movie (People/places/things that make you think of it)

Temporary WWC Button

Tomorrow: I Heart Etsy


WWC Master Participation List

Check out who's playing!

  • Aunt Jackie
  • Daisy
  • G-Man
  • Gary
  • Gramps
  • Janet
  • Jay
  • Karen
  • Kcinnova
  • Niki
  • Reb
  • Shania
  • Tawcan
  • Tink

    If you are not currently on this list but would like to be, please leave a request in the comment section of the most current WWC post.

    The purpose of this post is to compile a list of participating WWC members. This is not a contract. You do not have to sign up in order to take part in the WWC. This list will only serve as an easier means for other people to locate you. Names can be added as necessary (at the request of the participant). Anyone who does not participate in the contest for five consecutive weeks will be removed from the list until they request otherwise.

    Happy Snapping!
  • Labels:

    Wednesday, April 01, 2009

    Sometimes Like Dumpster Diving

    ...for those too lazy to move from their computer.

    Daily Etsy Picks:
    Smokey Guitar Strap
    Vintage Bordello Lamp
    Kawaii Sticker Pad

    WTF Etsy?:
    Fred Astor The Dancing Spice Man
    Lint Girls (So creepy.)
    Bleach Bag (For those who REALLY have too much money.)
    Born With A Beard - A Novel
    Sooo-Per Cap (Also known as, PLEASE beat up my kid.)